see you about an affair of some importance."-- "Indeed, Lady
Bellaston," said he, "I don't wonder you are astonished at the length
of my visit; for I have staid above two hours, and I did not think I
had staid above half-a-one."-- "What am I to conclude from thence, my
lord?" said she. "The company must be very agreeable which can make
time slide away so very deceitfully."-- "Upon my honour," said he,
"the most agreeable I ever saw. Pray tell me, Lady Bellaston, who is
this blazing star which you have produced among us all of a sudden?"--
"What blazing star, my lord?" said she, affecting a surprize. "I
mean," said he, "the lady I saw here the other day, whom I had last
night in my arms at the playhouse, and to whom I have been making that
unreasonable visit."-- "O, my cousin Western!" said she; "why, that
blazing star, my lord, is the daughter of a country booby squire,
and hath been in town about a fortnight, for the first time."-- "Upon
my soul," said he, "I should swear she had been bred up in a court;
for besides her beauty, I never saw anything so genteel, so sensible,
so polite."--"O brave!" cries the lady, "my cousin hath you, I
find."-- "Upon my honour," answered he, "I wish she had; for I am in
love with her to distraction."-- "Nay, my lord," said she, "it is not
wishing yourself very ill neither, for she is a very great fortune:
I assure you she is an only child, and her father's estate is a good
L3000 a-year." "Then I can assure you, madam," answered the lord, "I
think her the best match in England." "Indeed, my lord," replied
she, "if you like her, I heartily wish you had her." "If you think
so kindly of me, madam," said he, "as she is a relation of yours, will
you do me the honour to propose it to her father?" "And are you really
then in earnest?" cries the lady, with an affected gravity. "I hope,
madam," answered he, "you have a better opinion of me, than to imagine
I would jest with your ladyship in an affair of this kind." "Indeed,
then," said the lady, "I will most readily propose your lordship to
her father; and I can, I believe, assure you of his joyful
acceptance of the proposal; but there is a bar, which I am almost
ashamed to mention; and yet it is one you will never be able to
conquer. You have a rival, my lord, and a rival who, though I blush to
name him, neither you, nor all the world, will ever be able to
conquer." "Upon my word, Lady Bellaston," cries he, "you have struck a
damp to my heart, which hath almost deprived me of being." "Fie, my
lord," said she, "I should rather hope I had struck fire into you. A
lover, and talk of damps in your heart! I rather imagined you would
have asked your rival's name, that you might have immediately
entered the lists with him." "I promise you, madam," answered he,
"there are very few things I would not undertake for your charming
cousin; but pray, who is this happy man?"- "Why, he is," said she,
"what I am sorry to say most happy men with us are, one of the
lowest fellows in the world. He is a beggar, a bastard, a foundling, a
fellow in meaner circumstances than one of your lordship's footmen."
"And is it possible," cried he, "that a young creature with such
perfections should think of bestowing herself so unworthily?" "Alas!
my lord," answered she, "consider the country- the bane of all young
women is the country. There they learn a set of romantic notions of
love, and I know not what folly, which this town and good company
can scarce eradicate in a whole winter." "Indeed, madam," replied my
lord, "your cousin is of too immense a value to be thrown away; such
ruin as this must be prevented." "Alas!" cries she, "my lord, how
can it be prevented? The family have already done all in their
power; but the girl is, I think, intoxicated, and nothing less than
ruin will content her. And to deal more openly with you, I expect
every day to hear she is run away with him." "What you tell me, Lady
Bellaston," answered his lordship, "affects me most tenderly, and only
raises my compassion, instead of lessening my adoration of your
cousin. Some means must be found to preserve so inestimable a jewel.
Hath your ladyship endeavoured to reason with her?" Here the lady
affected a laugh, and cried, "My dear lord, sure you know us better
than to talk of reasoning a young woman out of her inclinations? These
inestimable jewels are as deaf as the jewels they wear: time, my lord,
time is the only medicine to cure their folly; but this is a
medicine which I am certain she will not take; nay, I live in hourly
horrors on her account. In short, nothing but violent methods will
do." "What is to be done?" cries my lord; "what methods are to be
taken?- Is there any method upon earth?- Oh! Lady Bellaston! there is
nothing which I would not undertake for such a reward."-- "I really
know not," answered the lady, after a pause; and then pausing again,
she cried out- "Upon my soul, I am at my wit's end on this girl's
account.- If she can be preserved, something must be done
immediately; and, as I say, nothing but violent methods will do.- If
your lordship hath really this attachment to my cousin (and to do
her justice, except in this silly inclination, of which she will
soon see her folly, she is every way deserving), I think there may
be one way, indeed it is a very disagreeable one, and what I am almost
afraid to think of.- It requires a great spirit, I promise you." "I
am not conscious, madam," said he, "of any defect there; nor am I, I
hope, suspected of any such. It must be an egregious defect indeed,
which could make me backward on this occasion." "Nay, my lord,"
answered she, "I am so far from doubting you, I am much more
inclined to doubt my own courage; for I must run a monstrous risque.
In short, I must place such a confidence in your honour as a wise
woman will scarce ever place in a man on any consideration." In this
point likewise my lord very well satisfied her; for his reputation was
extremely clear, and common fame did him no more than justice, in
speaking well of him. "Well, then," said she, "my lord,- I- I vow, I
can't bear the apprehension of it.- No, it must not be.-- At least
every other method shall be tried. Can you get rid of your
engagements, and dine here to-day? Your lordship will have an
opportunity of seeing a little more of Miss Western.- I promise you
we have no time to lose. Here will be nobody but Lady Betty, and
Miss Eagle, and Colonel Hampsted, and Tom Edwards; they will all go
soon-and I shall be at home to nobody. Then your lordship may be a
little more explicit. Nay, I will contrive some method to convince you
of her attachment to this fellow." My lord made proper compliments,
accepted the invitation, and then they parted to dress, it being now
past three in in the morning, or to reckon by the old style, in the
afternoon.
Chapter 3
A further explanation of the foregoing design
Though the reader may have long since concluded Lady Bellaston to be
a member (and no inconsiderable one) of the great world; she was in
reality a very considerable member of the little world; by which
appellation was distinguished a very worthy and honourable society
which not long since flourished in this kingdom.
Among other good principles upon which this society was founded,
there was one very remarkable; for, as it was a rule of an
honourable club of heroes, who assembled at the close of the late war,
that all the members should every day fight once at least; so 'twas in
this, that every member should, within the twenty-four hours, tell
at least one merry fib, which was to be propagated by all the brethren
and sisterhood.
Many idle stories were told about this society, which from a certain
quality may be, perhaps not unjustly, supposed to have come from the
society themselves. As, that the devil was the president; and that
he sat in person in an elbow-chair at the upper end of the table; but,
upon very strict inquiry, I find there is not the least truth in any
of those tales, and that the assembly consisted in reality of a set of
very good sort of people, and the fibs which they propagated were of a
harmless kind, and tended only to produce mirth and good humour.
Edwards was likewise a member of this comical society. To him
therefore Lady Bellaston applied as a proper instrument for her
purpose, and furnished him with a fib, which he was to vent whenever
the lady gave him her cue; and this was not to be till the evening,
when all the company but Lord Fellamar and himself were gone, and
while they were engaged in a rubbers at whist.
To this time then, which was between seven and eight in the evening,
we will convey our reader; when Lady Bellaston, Lord Fellamar, Miss
Western, and Tom, being engaged at whist, and in the last game of
their rubbers, Tom received his cue from Lady Bellaston, which was, "I
protest, Tom, you are grown intolerable lately; you used to tell us
all the news of the town, and now you know no more of the world than
if you lived out of it."
Mr. Edwards then began as follows: "The fault is not mine, madam: it
lies in the dulness of the age, that doth nothing worth talking
of.-- O la! though now I think on't, there hath a terrible accident
befallen poor Colonel Wilcox.-- Poor Ned.-- You know him, my lord,
everybody knows him; faith! I am very much concerned for him."
"What is it, pray?" says Lady Bellaston.
"Why, he hath killed a man this morning in a duel, that's all."
His lordship, who was not in the secret, asked gravely, whom he
had killed? To which Edwards answered, "A young fellow we none of us
know; a Somersetshire lad just came to town, one Jones his name is;
a near relation of one Mr. Allworthy, of whom your lordship I
believe hath heard. I saw the lad lie dead in a coffee-house.- Upon
my soul, he is one of the finest corpses I ever saw in my life!"
Sophia, who had just began to deal as Tom had mentioned that a man
was killed, stopt her hand, and listened with attention (for all
stories of that kind affected her), but no sooner had he arrived at
the latter part of the story than she began to deal again; and
having dealt three cards to one, and seven to another, and ten to a
third, at last dropt the rest from her hand, and fell back in her
chair.
The company behaved as usually on these occasions. The usual
disturbance ensued, the usual assistance was summoned, and Sophia at
last, as it is usual, returned again to life, and was soon after, at
her earnest desire, led to her own apartment; where, at my lord's
request, Lady Bellaston acquainted her with the truth, attempted to
carry it off as a jest of her own, and comforted her with repeated
assurances, that neither his lordship nor Tom, though she had taught
him the story, were in the true secret of the affair.
There was no farther evidence necessary to convince Lord Fellamar
how justly the case had been represented to him by Lady Bellaston; and
now, at her return into the room, a scheme was laid between these
two noble persons, which, though it appeared in no very heinous
light to his lordship (as he faithfully promised, and faithfully
resolved too, to make the lady all the subsequent amends in his
power by marriage), yet many of our readers, we doubt not, will see
with just detestation.
The next evening at seven was appointed for the fatal purpose,
when Lady Bellaston undertook that Sophia should be alone, and his
lordship should be introduced to her. The whole family were to be
regulated for the purpose, most of the servants dispatched out of
the house; and for Mrs. Honour, who, to prevent suspicion, was to be
left with her mistress till his lordship's arrival, Lady Bellaston
herself was to engage her in an apartment as distant as possible
from the scene of the intended mischief, and out of the hearing of
Sophia.
Matters being thus agreed on, his lordship took his leave, and her
ladyship retired to rest, highly pleased with a project, of which
she had no reason to doubt the success, and which promised so
effectually to remove Sophia from being any further obstruction to her
amour with Jones, by a means of which she should never appear to be
guilty, even if the fact appeared to the world; but this she made no
doubt of preventing by huddling up a marriage, to which she thought
the ravished Sophia would easily be brought to consent, and at which
all the rest of her family would rejoice.
But affairs were not in so quiet a situation in the bosom of the
other conspirator; his mind was tost in all the distracting anxiety so
nobly described by Shakespear-
Between the acting of a dreadful thing,
And the first motion, all the interim is
Like a phantasma, or a hideous dream;
The genius and the mortal instruments
Are then in council; and the state of man,
Like to a little kingdom, suffers then
The nature of an insurrection.--
Though the violence of his passion had made him eagerly embrace
the first hint of this design, especially as it came from a relation
of the lady, yet when that friend to reflection, a pillow, had
placed the action itself in all its natural black colours before his
eyes, with all the consequences which must, and those which might
probably attend it, his resolution began to abate, or rather indeed to
go over to the other side; and after a long conflict, which lasted a
whole night, between honour and appetite, the former at length
