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"That's what I want, and no mistake about it!" said Sancho."That's what I'm waiting for; for all this, word for word, is in storefor your worship under the title of the Knight of the RuefulCountenance."

"Thou needst not doubt it, Sancho," replied Don Quixote, "for in thesame manner, and by the same steps as I have described here,knights-errant rise and have risen to be kings and emperors; all wewant now is to find out what king, Christian or pagan, is at war andhas a beautiful daughter; but there will be time enough to think ofthat, for, as I have told thee, fame must be won in other quartersbefore repairing to the court. There is another thing, too, that iswanting; for supposing we find a king who is at war and has abeautiful daughter, and that I have won incredible fame throughout theuniverse, I know not how it can be made out that I am of royallineage, or even second cousin to an emperor; for the king will not bewilling to give me his daughter in marriage unless he is firstthoroughly satisfied on this point, however much my famous deeds maydeserve it; so that by this deficiency I fear I shall lose what my armhas fairly earned. True it is I am a gentleman of known house, ofestate and property, and entitled to the five hundred sueldos mulct;and it may be that the sage who shall write my history will so clearup my ancestry and pedigree that I may find myself fifth or sixth indescent from a king; for I would have thee know, Sancho, that thereare two kinds of lineages in the world; some there be tracing andderiving their descent from kings and princes, whom time has reducedlittle by little until they end in a point like a pyramid upside down;and others who spring from the common herd and go on rising step bystep until they come to be great lords; so that the difference is thatthe one were what they no longer are, and the others are what theyformerly were not. And I may be of such that after investigation myorigin may prove great and famous, with which the king, myfather-in-law that is to be, ought to be satisfied; and should henot be, the princess will so love me that even though she well knew meto be the son of a water-carrier, she will take me for her lord andhusband in spite of her father; if not, then it comes to seizing herand carrying her off where I please; for time or death will put an endto the wrath of her parents."

"It comes to this, too," said Sancho, "what some naughty people say,'Never ask as a favour what thou canst take by force;' though it wouldfit better to say, 'A clear escape is better than good men's prayers.'I say so because if my lord the king, your worship's father-in-law,will not condescend to give you my lady the princess, there is nothingfor it but, as your worship says, to seize her and transport her.But the mischief is that until peace is made and you come into thepeaceful enjoyment of your kingdom, the poor squire is famishing asfar as rewards go, unless it be that the confidante damsel that isto be his wife comes with the princess, and that with her he tidesover his bad luck until Heaven otherwise orders things; for hismaster, I suppose, may as well give her to him at once for a lawfulwife."

"Nobody can object to that," said Don Quixote.

"Then since that may be," said Sancho, "there is nothing for itbut to commend ourselves to God, and let fortune take what course itwill."

"God guide it according to my wishes and thy wants," said DonQuixote, "and mean be he who thinks himself mean."

"In God's name let him be so," said Sancho: "I am an oldChristian, and to fit me for a count that's enough."

"And more than enough for thee," said Don Quixote; "and even wertthou not, it would make no difference, because I being the king caneasily give thee nobility without purchase or service rendered bythee, for when I make thee a count, then thou art at once a gentleman;and they may say what they will, but by my faith they will have tocall thee 'your lordship,' whether they like it or not."

"Not a doubt of it; and I'll know how to support the tittle," saidSancho.

"Title thou shouldst say, not tittle," said his master.

"So be it," answered Sancho. "I say I will know how to behave, foronce in my life I was beadle of a brotherhood, and the beadle's gownsat so well on me that all said I looked as if I was to be stewardof the same brotherhood. What will it be, then, when I put a duke'srobe on my back, or dress myself in gold and pearls like a count? Ibelieve they'll come a hundred leagues to see me."

"Thou wilt look well," said Don Quixote, "but thou must shave thybeard often, for thou hast it so thick and rough and unkempt, thatif thou dost not shave it every second day at least, they will seewhat thou art at the distance of a musket shot."

"What more will it be," said Sancho, "than having a barber, andkeeping him at wages in the house? and even if it be necessary, I willmake him go behind me like a nobleman's equerry."

"Why, how dost thou know that noblemen have equerries behindthem?" asked Don Quixote.

"I will tell you," answered Sancho. "Years ago I was for a monthat the capital and there I saw taking the air a very small gentlemanwho they said was a very great man, and a man following him onhorseback in every turn he took, just as if he was his tail. I askedwhy this man did not join the other man, instead of always goingbehind him; they answered me that he was his equerry, and that itwas the custom with nobles to have such persons behind them, andever since then I know it, for I have never forgotten it."

"Thou art right," said Don Quixote, "and in the same way thou mayestcarry thy barber with thee, for customs did not come into use alltogether, nor were they all invented at once, and thou mayest be thefirst count to have a barber to follow him; and, indeed, shaving one'sbeard is a greater trust than saddling one's horse."

"Let the barber business be my look-out," said Sancho; "and yourworship's be it to strive to become a king, and make me a count."

"So it shall be," answered Don Quixote, and raising his eyes hesaw what will be told in the following chapter.

CHAPTER XXII

OF THE FREEDOM DON QUIXOTE CONFERRED ON SEVERAL UNFORTUNATES WHOAGAINST THEIR WILL WERE BEING CARRIED WHERE THEY HAD NO WISH TO GO

CIDE Hamete Benengeli, the Arab and Manchegan author, relates inthis most grave, high-sounding, minute, delightful, and originalhistory that after the discussion between the famous Don Quixote of LaMancha and his squire Sancho Panza which is set down at the end ofchapter twenty-one, Don Quixote raised his eyes and saw coming alongthe road he was following some dozen men on foot strung together bythe neck, like beads, on a great iron chain, and all with manacleson their hands. With them there came also two men on horseback and twoon foot; those on horseback with wheel-lock muskets, those on footwith javelins and swords, and as soon as Sancho saw them he said:

"That is a chain of galley slaves, on the way to the galleys byforce of the king's orders."

"How by force?" asked Don Quixote; "is it possible that the kinguses force against anyone?"

"I do not say that," answered Sancho, "but that these are peoplecondemned for their crimes to serve by force in the king's galleys."

"In fact," replied Don Quixote, "however it may be, these people aregoing where they are taking them by force, and not of their own will."

"Just so," said Sancho.

"Then if so," said Don Quixote, "here is a case for the exerciseof my office, to put down force and to succour and help the wretched."

"Recollect, your worship," said Sancho, "Justice, which is theking himself, is not using force or doing wrong to such persons, butpunishing them for their crimes."

The chain of galley slaves had by this time come up, and Don Quixotein very courteous language asked those who were in custody of it to begood enough to tell him the reason or reasons for which they wereconducting these people in this manner. One of the guards on horsebackanswered that they were galley slaves belonging to his majesty, thatthey were going to the galleys, and that was all that was to be saidand all he had any business to know.

"Nevertheless," replied Don Quixote, "I should like to know fromeach of them separately the reason of his misfortune;" to this headded more to the same effect to induce them to tell him what hewanted so civilly that the other mounted guard said to him:

"Though we have here the register and certificate of the sentence ofevery one of these wretches, this is no time to take them out orread them; come and ask themselves; they can tell if they choose,and they will, for these fellows take a pleasure in doing andtalking about rascalities."

With this permission, which Don Quixote would have taken even hadthey not granted it, he approached the chain and asked the first forwhat offences he was now in such a sorry case.

He made answer that it was for being a lover.

"For that only?" replied Don Quixote; "why, if for being lovers theysend people to the galleys I might have been rowing in them long ago."

"The love is not the sort your worship is thinking of," said thegalley slave; "mine was that I loved a washerwoman's basket of cleanlinen so well, and held it so close in my embrace, that if the armof the law had not forced it from me, I should never have let it go ofmy own will to this moment; I was caught in the act, there was nooccasion for torture, the case was settled, they treated me to ahundred lashes on the back, and three years of gurapas besides, andthat was the end of it."

"What are gurapas?" asked Don Quixote.

"Gurapas are galleys," answered the galley slave, who was a youngman of about four-and-twenty, and said he was a native of Piedrahita.

Don Quixote asked the same question of the second, who made noreply, so downcast and melancholy was he; but the first answered forhim, and said, "He, sir, goes as a canary, I mean as a musician anda singer."

"What!" said Don Quixote, "for being musicians and singers arepeople sent to the galleys too?"

"Yes, sir," answered the galley slave, "for there is nothing worsethan singing under suffering."

"On the contrary, I have heard say," said Don Quixote, "that hewho sings scares away his woes."

"Here it is the reverse," said the galley slave; "for he who singsonce weeps all his life."

"I do not understand it," said Don Quixote; but one of the guardssaid to him, "Sir, to sing under suffering means with the non sanctafraternity to confess under torture; they put this sinner to thetorture and he confessed his crime, which was being a cuatrero, thatis a cattle-stealer, and on his confession they sentenced him to sixyears in the galleys, besides two bundred lashes that he has alreadyhad on the back; and he is always dejected and downcast because theother thieves that were left behind and that march here ill-treat, andsnub, and jeer, and despise him for confessing and not having spiritenough to say nay; for, say they, 'nay' has no more letters in it than'yea,' and a culprit is well off when life or death with him dependson his own tongue and not on that of witnesses or evidence; and tomy thinking they are not very far out."

"And I think so too," answered Don Quixote; then passing on to thethird he asked him what he had asked the others, and the mananswered very readily and unconcernedly, "I am going for five years totheir ladyships the gurapas for the want of ten ducats."

"I will give twenty with pleasure to get you out of that trouble,"said Don Quixote.

"That," said the galley slave, "is like a man having money at seawhen he is dying of hunger and has no way of buying what he wants; Isay so because if at the right time I had had those twenty ducats thatyour worship now offers me, I would have greased the notary's penand freshened up the attorney's wit with them, so that to-day I shouldbe in the middle of the plaza of the Zocodover at Toledo, and not onthis road coupled like a greyhound. But God is great; patience- there,that's enough of it."

Don Quixote passed on to the fourth, a man of venerable aspectwith a white beard falling below his breast, who on hearing himselfasked the reason of his being there began to weep without answeringa word, but the fifth acted as his tongue and said, "This worthy manis going to the galleys for four years, after having gone the roundsin ceremony and on horseback."

"That means," said Sancho Panza, "as I take it, to have beenexposed to shame in public."

"Just so," replied the galley slave, "and the offence for which theygave him that punishment was having been an ear-broker, naybody-broker; I mean, in short, that this gentleman goes as a pimp, andfor having besides a certain touch of the sorcerer about him."

"If that touch had not been thrown in," said Don Quixote, "bewould not deserve, for mere pimping, to row in the galleys, but ratherto command and be admiral of them; for the office of pimp is noordinary one, being the office of persons of discretion, one verynecessary in a well-ordered state, and only to be exercised by personsof good birth; nay, there ought to be an inspector and overseer ofthem, as in other offices, and recognised number, as with thebrokers on change; in this way many of the evils would be avoidedwhich are caused by this office and calling being in the hands ofstupid and ignorant people, such as women more or less silly, andpages and jesters of little standing and experience, who on the mosturgent occasions, and when ingenuity of contrivance is needed, let thecrumbs freeze on the way to their mouths, and know not which istheir right hand. I should like to go farther, and give reasons toshow that it is advisable to choose those who are to hold so necessaryan office in the state, but this is not the fit place for it; some dayI will expound the matter to some one able to see to and rectify it;all I say now is, that the additional fact of his being a sorcerer hasremoved the sorrow it gave me to see these white hairs and thisvenerable countenance in so painful a position on account of his beinga pimp; though I know well there are no sorceries in the world thatcan move or compel the will as some simple folk fancy, for our will isfree, nor is there herb or charm that can force it. All that certainsilly women and quacks do is to turn men mad with potions and poisons,pretending that they have power to cause love, for, as I say, it is animpossibility to compel the will."