'Thank you, Sir,' said Mary, tripping towards the door again.
'Sam has not been here long, has he?' inquired Mr. Pickwick.
'Oh, no, Sir,' replied Mary eagerly. 'He has only just come home. He is
not going to ask you for any more leave, Sir, he says.'
Mary might have been conscious that she had communicated this last
intelligence with more warmth than seemed actually necessary, or she
might have observed the good-humoured smile with which Mr. Pickwick
regarded her, when she had finished speaking. She certainly held down
her head, and examined the corner of a very smart little apron, with
more closeness than there appeared any absolute occasion for.
'Tell them they can come up at once, by all means,' said Mr. Pickwick.
Mary, apparently much relieved, hurried away with her message.
Mr. Pickwick took two or three turns up and down the room; and, rubbing
his chin with his left hand as he did so, appeared lost in thought.
'Well, well,' said Mr. Pickwick, at length in a kind but somewhat
melancholy tone, 'it is the best way in which I could reward him for his
attachment and fidelity; let it be so, in Heaven's name. It is the fate
of a lonely old man, that those about him should form new and different
attachments and leave him. I have no right to expect that it should
be otherwise with me. No, no,' added Mr. Pickwick more cheerfully,
'it would be selfish and ungrateful. I ought to be happy to have an
opportunity of providing for him so well. I am. Of course I am.'
Mr. Pickwick had been so absorbed in these reflections, that a knock at
the door was three or four times repeated before he heard it. Hastily
seating himself, and calling up his accustomed pleasant looks, he gave
the required permission, and Sam Weller entered, followed by his father.
'Glad to see you back again, Sam,' said Mr. Pickwick. 'How do you do,
Mr. Weller?'
'Wery hearty, thank'ee, sir,' replied the widower; 'hope I see you well,
sir.'
'Quite, I thank you,' replied Mr. Pickwick.
'I wanted to have a little bit o' conwersation with you, sir,' said Mr.
Weller, 'if you could spare me five minits or so, sir.'
'Certainly,' replied Mr. Pickwick. 'Sam, give your father a chair.'
'Thank'ee, Samivel, I've got a cheer here,' said Mr. Weller, bringing
one forward as he spoke; 'uncommon fine day it's been, sir,' added the
old gentleman, laying his hat on the floor as he sat himself down.
'Remarkably so, indeed,' replied Mr. Pickwick. 'Very seasonable.'
'Seasonablest veather I ever see, sir,' rejoined Mr. Weller. Here, the
old gentleman was seized with a violent fit of coughing, which, being
terminated, he nodded his head and winked and made several supplicatory
and threatening gestures to his son, all of which Sam Weller steadily
abstained from seeing.
Mr. Pickwick, perceiving that there was some embarrassment on the old
gentleman's part, affected to be engaged in cutting the leaves of a book
that lay beside him, and waited patiently until Mr. Weller should arrive
at the object of his visit.
'I never see sich a aggrawatin' boy as you are, Samivel,' said Mr.
Weller, looking indignantly at his son; 'never in all my born days.'
'What is he doing, Mr. Weller?' inquired Mr. Pickwick.
'He von't begin, sir,' rejoined Mr. Weller; 'he knows I ain't ekal to
ex-pressin' myself ven there's anythin' partickler to be done, and yet
he'll stand and see me a-settin' here taking up your walable time, and
makin' a reg'lar spectacle o' myself, rayther than help me out vith a
syllable. It ain't filial conduct, Samivel,' said Mr. Weller, wiping his
forehead; 'wery far from it.'
'You said you'd speak,' replied Sam; 'how should I know you wos done up
at the wery beginnin'?'
'You might ha' seen I warn't able to start,' rejoined his father; 'I'm
on the wrong side of the road, and backin' into the palin's, and all
manner of unpleasantness, and yet you von't put out a hand to help me.
I'm ashamed on you, Samivel.'
'The fact is, Sir,' said Sam, with a slight bow, 'the gov'nor's been
a-drawin' his money.'
'Wery good, Samivel, wery good,' said Mr. Weller, nodding his head with
a satisfied air, 'I didn't mean to speak harsh to you, Sammy. Wery good.
That's the vay to begin. Come to the pint at once. Wery good indeed,
Samivel.'
Mr. Weller nodded his head an extraordinary number of times, in the
excess of his gratification, and waited in a listening attitude for Sam
to resume his statement.
'You may sit down, Sam,' said Mr. Pickwick, apprehending that the
interview was likely to prove rather longer than he had expected.
Sam bowed again and sat down; his father looking round, he continued--
'The gov'nor, sir, has drawn out five hundred and thirty pound.'
'Reduced counsels,' interposed Mr. Weller, senior, in an undertone.
'It don't much matter vether it's reduced counsels, or wot not,' said
Sam; 'five hundred and thirty pounds is the sum, ain't it?'
'All right, Samivel,' replied Mr. Weller.
'To vich sum, he has added for the house and bisness--'
'Lease, good-vill, stock, and fixters,' interposed Mr. Weller.
'As much as makes it,' continued Sam, 'altogether, eleven hundred and
eighty pound.'
'Indeed!' said Mr. Pickwick. 'I am delighted to hear it. I congratulate
you, Mr. Weller, on having done so well.'
'Vait a minit, Sir,' said Mr. Weller, raising his hand in a deprecatory
manner. 'Get on, Samivel.'
'This here money,' said Sam, with a little hesitation, 'he's anxious to
put someveres, vere he knows it'll be safe, and I'm wery anxious too,
for if he keeps it, he'll go a-lendin' it to somebody, or inwestin'
property in horses, or droppin' his pocket-book down an airy, or makin'
a Egyptian mummy of his-self in some vay or another.'
'Wery good, Samivel,' observed Mr. Weller, in as complacent a manner
as if Sam had been passing the highest eulogiums on his prudence and
foresight. 'Wery good.'
'For vich reasons,' continued Sam, plucking nervously at the brim of his
hat--'for vich reasons, he's drawn it out to-day, and come here vith me
to say, leastvays to offer, or in other vords--'
'To say this here,' said the elder Mr. Weller impatiently, 'that it
ain't o' no use to me. I'm a-goin' to vork a coach reg'lar, and ha'n't
got noveres to keep it in, unless I vos to pay the guard for takin'
care on it, or to put it in vun o' the coach pockets, vich 'ud be a
temptation to the insides. If you'll take care on it for me, sir, I
shall be wery much obliged to you. P'raps,' said Mr. Weller, walking up
to Mr. Pickwick and whispering in his ear--'p'raps it'll go a little
vay towards the expenses o' that 'ere conwiction. All I say is, just
you keep it till I ask you for it again.' With these words, Mr. Weller
placed the pocket-book in Mr. Pickwick's hands, caught up his hat, and
ran out of the room with a celerity scarcely to be expected from so
corpulent a subject.
'Stop him, Sam!' exclaimed Mr. Pickwick earnestly. 'Overtake him; bring
him back instantly! Mr. Weller--here--come back!'
Sam saw that his master's injunctions were not to be disobeyed; and,
catching his father by the arm as he was descending the stairs, dragged
him back by main force.
'My good friend,' said Mr. Pickwick, taking the old man by the hand,
'your honest confidence overpowers me.'
'I don't see no occasion for nothin' o' the kind, Sir,' replied Mr.
Weller obstinately.
'I assure you, my good friend, I have more money than I can ever
need; far more than a man at my age can ever live to spend,' said Mr.
Pickwick.
'No man knows how much he can spend, till he tries,' observed Mr.
Weller.
'Perhaps not,' replied Mr. Pickwick; 'but as I have no intention of
trying any such experiments, I am not likely to come to want. I must beg
you to take this back, Mr. Weller.' 'Wery well,' said Mr. Weller, with
a discontented look. 'Mark my vords, Sammy, I'll do somethin' desperate
vith this here property; somethin' desperate!'
'You'd better not,' replied Sam.
Mr. Weller reflected for a short time, and then, buttoning up his coat
with great determination, said--
'I'll keep a pike.'
'Wot!' exclaimed Sam.
'A pike!' rejoined Mr. Weller, through his set teeth; 'I'll keep a pike.
Say good-bye to your father, Samivel. I dewote the remainder of my days
to a pike.'
This threat was such an awful one, and Mr. Weller, besides appearing
fully resolved to carry it into execution, seemed so deeply mortified by
Mr. Pickwick's refusal, that that gentleman, after a short reflection,
said--
'Well, well, Mr. Weller, I will keep your money. I can do more good with
it, perhaps, than you can.'
'Just the wery thing, to be sure,' said Mr. Weller, brightening up; 'o'
course you can, sir.'
'Say no more about it,' said Mr. Pickwick, locking the pocket-book in
his desk; 'I am heartily obliged to you, my good friend. Now sit down
again. I want to ask your advice.'
The internal laughter occasioned by the triumphant success of his visit,
which had convulsed not only Mr. Weller's face, but his arms, legs, and
body also, during the locking up of the pocket-book, suddenly gave place
to the most dignified gravity as he heard these words.
'Wait outside a few minutes, Sam, will you?' said Mr. Pickwick.
Sam immediately withdrew.
Mr. Weller looked uncommonly wise and very much amazed, when Mr.
Pickwick opened the discourse by saying--
'You are not an advocate for matrimony, I think, Mr. Weller?'
Mr. Weller shook his head. He was wholly unable to speak; vague thoughts
of some wicked widow having been successful in her designs on Mr.
Pickwick, choked his utterance.
'Did you happen to see a young girl downstairs when you came in just now
with your son?' inquired Mr. Pickwick.
'Yes. I see a young gal,' replied Mr. Weller shortly.
'What did you think of her, now? Candidly, Mr. Weller, what did you
think of her?'
'I thought she wos wery plump, and vell made,' said Mr. Weller, with a
critical air.
'So she is,' said Mr. Pickwick, 'so she is. What did you think of her
manners, from what you saw of her?'
'Wery pleasant,' rejoined Mr. Weller. 'Wery pleasant and comformable.'
The precise meaning which Mr. Weller attached to this last-mentioned
adjective, did not appear; but, as it was evident from the tone in which
he used it that it was a favourable expression, Mr. Pickwick was as well
satisfied as if he had been thoroughly enlightened on the subject.
'I take a great interest in her, Mr. Weller,' said Mr. Pickwick.
Mr. Weller coughed.
'I mean an interest in her doing well,' resumed Mr. Pickwick; 'a desire
that she may be comfortable and prosperous. You understand?'
'Wery clearly,' replied Mr. Weller, who understood nothing yet.
'That young person,' said Mr. Pickwick, 'is attached to your son.'
'To Samivel Veller!' exclaimed the parent.
'Yes,' said Mr. Pickwick.
'It's nat'ral,' said Mr. Weller, after some consideration, 'nat'ral, but
rayther alarmin'. Sammy must be careful.'
'How do you mean?' inquired Mr. Pickwick.
'Wery careful that he don't say nothin' to her,' responded Mr. Weller.
'Wery careful that he ain't led avay, in a innocent moment, to say
anythin' as may lead to a conwiction for breach. You're never safe vith
'em, Mr. Pickwick, ven they vunce has designs on you; there's no knowin'
vere to have 'em; and vile you're a-considering of it, they have you. I
wos married fust, that vay myself, Sir, and Sammy wos the consekens o'
the manoover.'
'You give me no great encouragement to conclude what I have to say,'
observed Mr. Pickwick, 'but I had better do so at once. This young
person is not only attached to your son, Mr. Weller, but your son is
attached to her.'
'Vell,' said Mr. Weller, 'this here's a pretty sort o' thing to come to
a father's ears, this is!'
'I have observed them on several occasions,' said Mr. Pickwick, making
no comment on Mr. Weller's last remark; 'and entertain no doubt at all
about it. Supposing I were desirous of establishing them comfortably as
man and wife in some little business or situation, where they might hope
to obtain a decent living, what should you think of it, Mr. Weller?'
At first, Mr. Weller received with wry faces a proposition involving the
marriage of anybody in whom he took an interest; but, as Mr. Pickwick
argued the point with him, and laid great stress on the fact that Mary
was not a widow, he gradually became more tractable. Mr. Pickwick
had great influence over him, and he had been much struck with Mary's
appearance; having, in fact, bestowed several very unfatherly winks upon
her, already. At length he said that it was not for him to oppose Mr.
Pickwick's inclination, and that he would be very happy to yield to
his advice; upon which, Mr. Pickwick joyfully took him at his word, and
