“Well, I wouldn’t be sitting here eating dinner with the kids running around having fun outside if you weren’t thoughtful now, but I was actually referring to when we were children.”
“I don’t think so, Richard,” Holly said, shaking her head. “Jack and I were always so awful to you,” she said softly.
“You weren’t always awful, Holly.” He gave her an amused smile. “Anyway, that’s what brothers and sisters are for, to make each other’s lives as difficult as possible for each other as they grow up. It forms a great basis for life, toughens you up. Anyway, I was the bossy older brother.”
“So how does that make me thoughtful?” Holly asked, feeling she had completely missed the point.
“You idolized Jack. You used to follow him around all the time and you would do exactly what he told you to do.” He started laughing. “I used to hear him telling you to say things to me and you would run into my room terrified and blurt them out and run away again.”
Holly looked at her plate feeling embarrassed. She and Jack used to play terrible tricks on him.
“But you always came back,” Richard continued. “You would always creep back into my room silently and watch me working at my desk, and I knew that was your way of saying sorry.” He smiled at her. “So that makes you thoughtful. None of our siblings had a conscience in that house of ours. Not even me. You were the only one, always the sensitive one.”
He continued eating his dinner and Holly sat in silence, trying to absorb all the information he had given her. She didn’t remember idolizing Jack, but when she thought about it she supposed Richard was right. Jack was her funny, cool, good-looking big brother who had loads of friends, and Holly used to beg him to let her play with them. She supposed she still felt that way about him; if he called her right now and asked her to go out she would drop everything and go, and she had never even realized that before. However, she was spending far more time with Richard than with Jack these days. Jack had always been her favorite brother; Gerry had always gotten along with Jack the best. It was Jack who Gerry would choose to go out for drinks with during the week, not Richard; it was Jack who Gerry would insist on sitting beside at a family dinner. However Gerry was gone, and although Jack rang her every now and then, he wasn’t around as much as he used to be. Had Holly held Jack up on too much of a pedestal? She realized then that she had been making excuses for him every time he didn’t call around or phone her when he said he would. In fact, she had been making excuses for him ever since Gerry had died.
Richard had, lately, managed to give Holly a regular intake of food for thought. She watched him remove his serviette from his collar and was interested as he folded it into a neat little square with perfect right angles. He obsessively straightened whatever was on the table so that everything was facing the right way in an orderly fashion. For all Richard’s good qualities, which she recognized now, Holly could not live with a man like that at all.
They both jumped as they heard a thump from outside and saw little Emily lying on the ground in floods of tears while a shocked-looking Timmy watched. Richard leapt out of his chair and hurried outside.
“But she just fell, Daddy, I didn’t do anything!” she heard Timmy plead with his father. Poor Timmy. She rolled her eyes as she watched Richard dragging him by the arm and ordering him to stand in the corner to think about what he had done. Some people would never really change, she thought wryly.
The next day Holly jumped around the house ecstatically as she replayed the message on the answering machine for the third time.
“Hi Holly,” came the gruff voice. “This is Chris Feeney here from magazine X. I’m just calling to say that I was very impressed with your interview. Em . . .” He stalled a bit. “Well, I wouldn’t normally say this on an answering machine, but no doubt you’ll be delighted to know that I’ve decided to welcome you as a new member of the team. I would love you to start as soon as possible, so call me on the usual number when you get a chance and we’ll discuss it further. Em . . . Good-bye.”
Holly rolled around her bed in terrified delight and pressed the PLAY button again. She had aimed for the moon . . . and she had now landed!
Thirty-seven
HOLLY STARED UP AT THE tall Georgian building and her body tingled with excitement. It was her first day of work and she felt good times were ahead of her in this building. It was situated in the center of town, and the busy offices of magazine X were on the second floor above a small café. Holly had gotten very little sleep the night before due to nerves and excitement all rolled into one; however, she didn’t feel the same dread that she usually felt before starting a new job. She had phoned Mr. Feeney back immediately (after listening to his voice message another three times) and then she had shared the news with her family and friends. They had been ecstatic when they heard the news, and just before she left the house that morning she had received a beautiful bouquet of flowers from her parents congratulating her and wishing her luck on her first day.
She felt like she was starting her first day at school and had gone shopping for new pens, a new notepad, a folder and a new briefcase that made her look extra intelligent. But although she had felt excited when she sat down to eat her breakfast, she had also felt sad. Sad that Gerry wasn’t there to share her new start. They had performed a little ritual every time Holly started a new job, which was quite a regular occurrence. Gerry would wake Holly up with breakfast in bed and then he would pack her bag with ham and cheese sandwiches, an apple, a packet of crisps and a bar of chocolate. Then he would drive her into work on her first day, call her on her lunch break to see if the other kids in the office were playing nicely, and return at the end of the day to collect her and bring her home. Then they would sit together over dinner and he would listen and laugh as Holly explained all the different characters in her office and once again grumble about how she hated going to work. Mind you, they only ever did that on her first day, every other day they would tumble out of bed late as usual, race each other to the shower and then wander around the kitchen half asleep, grumbling at each other while they grabbed a quick cup of coffee to help them get started. They would give each other a kiss good-bye and go their separate ways for the day. And then they would start all over again the next day. If Holly had known their time would be so precious, she wouldn’t have bothered carrying out all those tedious routines day after day . . .
This morning, however, had been a very different scenario. She awoke to an empty house in an empty bed to no breakfast. She didn’t have to fight for her right to use the shower first and the kitchen was quiet without the sound of his fits of morning sneezes. She had allowed herself to imagine that when she woke up Gerry would miraculously be there to greet her because it was tradition and such a special day that it wouldn’t feel right without him. But with death there were no exceptions. Gone meant gone.
Now, poised at the entrance, Holly checked herself to see that her fly wasn’t undone, her jacket wasn’t tucked into her knickers and her shirt buttons were fastened properly. Satisfied that she looked presentable, she made her way up the wooden staircase to her new office. She entered the waiting room area and the secretary she recognized from the interview came from around the desk to meet her.
“Hi Holly,” she said happily, shaking her hand, “welcome to our humble abode.” She held her hands up to display the room. Holly had liked this woman from the moment she had met her at the interview. She looked to be about the same age as Holly and had long blond hair and a face that seemed to be always happy and smiling.
“I’m Alice by the way, and I work out here in reception as you know. Well, I’ll bring you to the boss man now. He’s waiting for you.”
“God, I’m not late, am I?” Holly asked, worriedly glancing at her watch. She had left the house early to beat the traffic and she had given herself plenty of time to avoid being late on her first day.
“No, you’re not at all,” Alice said, leading her down to Mr. Feeney’s office. “Don’t mind Chris and all the other lot, they’re all workaholics. They need to get themselves a life, bless them. You wouldn’t see me hanging around here anytime after six, that’s for sure.”
Holly laughed; Alice reminded her of her former self.
“By the way, don’t feel that you have to come in early and stay late just because they do. I think Chris actually lives in his office, so you’ll never compete with that. The man isn’t normal,” she said loudly, tapping on his door lightly and leading her in.
“Who’s not normal?” Mr. Feeney asked gruffly, standing up from his chair and stretching.
“You.” Alice smiled and closed the door behind her.
“See how my staff treat me?” Mr. Feeney laughed, approaching Holly and holding out his hand to greet her. His handshake was once again warm and welcoming, and Holly felt immediately at ease with the atmosphere between the workers.
“Thank you for hiring me, Mr. Feeney,” Holly said genuinely.
“You can call me Chris, and there’s no need to thank me. Right, why don’t you follow me and I’ll show you around the place.” He started leading her down the hall. The walls were covered by framed covers of every X magazine that had been published for the last twenty years.
“There’s not much to the place; in here is our office of little ants.” He pushed open the door and Holly looked into the huge office. There were about ten desks in all, and the room was packed with people all sitting in front of their computers and talking on the phone. They looked up and waved politely. Holly smiled at them, remembering how important first impressions were. “These are the wonderful journalists who help pay my bills,” Chris explained. “That’s John Paul the fashion editor; Mary our food woman; and Brian, Steven, Gordon, Aishling and Tracey. You don’t need to know what they do, they’re just wasters.” He laughed and one of the men gave Chris the finger and continued talking on the phone. Holly presumed he was one of the men accused of being a waster.
“Everyone, this is Holly!” Chris yelled, and they smiled and waved again and continued talking on the phone.
“The rest of the journalists are freelancers, so you won’t see them hanging around these offices much,” Chris explained, leading her to the room next door. “This is where all our computer nerds hide. That’s Dermot and Wayne, and they’re in charge of layout and design, so you’ll be working closely with them and keeping them informed about what advertisements are going where. Lads, this is Holly.”
“Hi, Holly.” They both stood up and shook her hand and then continued working on their computers again.
“I have them well trained,” Chris chuckled, and he headed back out to the hall again. “Down here is the boardroom. We have meetings every morning at eight forty-five.”
Holly nodded to everything he was saying and tried to remember the names of everyone he had introduced to her.
“Down those steps are the toilets, and I’ll show you your office now.”
He headed back down the way they had come and Holly glanced at the walls feeling excited. This was nothing like she had ever experienced before.
“In here is your office,” he said, pushing the door open and allowing her to walk in ahead of him.
Holly couldn’t stop herself from smiling as she looked around at the small room. She had never had her own office before. It was just big enough to fit a desk and filing cabinet. There was a computer sitting on the desk with piles and piles of folders. Opposite the desk was a bookcase crammed with yet more books, folders and stacks of old magazines. The huge Georgian window practically covered the entire back wall behind her desk, and although it was cold and windy outside, the room had a bright and airy feel to it. She could definitely see herself working here.
“It’s perfect,” she told Chris, placing her briefcase on the desk and looking around.
“Good,” Chris said. “The last guy who was here was extremely organized, and all those folders there will explain very clearly what exactly it is you need to do. If you have any problems or any questions about anything at all, just come ask me. I’m right next door.” He knocked on the wall that separated their offices.
“Now I’m not looking for miracles from you, because I know you’re new to this, which is why I expect you to ask lots of questions. Our next edition is due out next week, as we put them out on the first day of every month.”
Holly’s eyes widened; she had a week to fill an entire magazine.
“Don’t worry.” He smiled again. “I want you to concentrate on November’s edition. Familiarize yourself with the layout of the magazine, as we stick to the same style every month, so you will know what kind of pages will need what type of advertisements. This is a lot of work, but if you keep yourself organized and work well with the rest of the team, everything will run smoothly. Again, I ask you to speak to Dermot and Wayne, and they’ll fill you in on the standard layout, and if you need anything done, just ask Alice. She’s there to help everyone.” He stopped talking and looked around. “So that’s about it. Any questions?”
Holly shook her head. “No, I think you covered just about everything.”
“Right, I’ll leave you to it so.” He closed the door behind him and Holly sat down at her new desk in her new office. She was slightly daunted by her new life. This was the most impressive job she had ever had, and by the sounds of things she was going to be extremely busy, but she was glad. She needed to keep her mind occupied. However, there was no way on earth she had remembered everyone’s name, so she took out her notepad and pen and started to write down the ones she knew. She opened the folders and got to work.
She was so engrossed in her reading that she realized after a while that she had worked through her lunch break. By the sounds of things, no one else from the office had budged an inch. In her other jobs, Holly would stop working at least half an hour before lunchtime just to think about what she was going to eat. Then she would leave fifteen minutes early and return fifteen minutes late due to “traffic,” even though she would walk to the shop. Holly would daydream the majority of the day, make personal phone calls, especially abroad, because she didn’t have to pay the bill, and would be first in queue to collect her monthly paycheck, which was usually spent within two weeks.
Yes, this was very different from her previous jobs, but she was looking forward to every minute of it.
“Right Ciara, are you sure you’ve got your passport?” Holly’s mum asked her daughter for the third time since leaving the house.
“Yes, Mum,” Ciara groaned, “I told you a million billion times, it’s right here.”
