techniques for purifying water.
“Where to now?” Jace asked when they were leaving the cafeteria.
“You said Adrien was off work soon?” Greg asked.
“Should be by now,” Jace said, checking his watch. “Let’s head back
to the dorm and see.”
“Hold up,” Greg said, placing a hand on Jace’s shoulder. “Why don’t
I go hang out with Adrien? We always get along, right?”
Adrien tended to alternate between drooling over Greg and wincing,
but Jace supposed that was a camaraderie of sorts.
Greg grabbed Victor’s shoulder too. “That’ll give you guys some
private time. Go out to dinner or something.”
“We just ate,” Victor pointed out.
“Drinks then,” Greg said.
“How about we all go out for a drink?” Jace suggested. He couldn’t
imagine Victor hanging out in a bar. At least not the kind filled with
dance music and flashing lights, but what else was Jace going to do with
him? The dorm room was awfully small for four people, and they
couldn’t all go squat in the woods somewhere. Nine times out of ten, that
was the environment Jace pictured Victor being.
“Drinks sound good,” Victor said. “Let’s go get Adrien and show
him a good time.”
A good time? A high school sweetheart, a prima donna boyfriend,
and a best friend with the most hell-paved of good intensions… Of all
the potential the night held, Jace wondered if a good time was even
remotely possible.
Chapter Fourteen
The bass of the music matched pace with Jace’s heart. Boom boom
boom bu-dah boom boom boom! His pulse was racing too quickly, but it
wasn’t passion or lust that had his blood pumping. Instead, Jace
suspected he was experiencing his first anxiety attack. Or maybe this was
the normal feeling that preceded committing murder.
“I’ve often wondered why homeless people sleep on the streets,”
Adrien was shouting over the music. “Why huddle under a filthy
cardboard box when you could live in the woods? Much prettier!”
Adrien’s face was scrunched up, as it had been since meeting Victor,
struggling with an unsolvable conundrum. Adrien assumed most people
were gay, but Victor didn’t fit any stereotype or archetype he could dig
up. Twink, bear, queen, or sugar daddy? None of the above. Jace could
see him struggling to work it out, the strain playing out on his face. At
one point, Adrien even seemed to mouth, “Art fag?”
“I don’t really consider myself homeless,” Victor said. “I just stay in
a variety of places. Although really we’re all homeless. You don’t own
the dorm you live in, or the apartment you’ll inevitably rent next. If the
owner of the property wants you out, you’ll have to go, one way or
another. Even if you own a home and land, you’ll find yourself moving if
the government wants to build a highway or airport there. Or you never
know when the next natural disaster will hit. So really, we’re all just
guests at the mercy of more powerful forces.”
Adrien blinked. “So you really eat out of trash cans?”
Jace tightened the grip on his beer bottle. “He doesn’t eat out of the
trash!”
“Sure I do,” Victor said, calm as can be. “Grocery stores are always
throwing out perfectly good food just because of a trivial expiration date.
I’ve done my share of dumpster diving.”
“That’s disgusting!” Adrien cried.
“Oh, come on!” Greg looked ready to pounce. “You’ve never found
and eaten something in your cupboard that was past the expiration date?
Cookies? Or milk that still smelled fine?”
Adrien rolled his eyes. “Digging around in the trash is completely
different.”
Victor seemed amused. “We’re talking dumpsters full of products
still in their packaging. It’s like one messy cupboard. I’ll show you
tonight. We’ll hit the local grocery store and dig up something for
breakfast.”
“Bathing must be a bitch,” Adrien continued unabashed. “What do
you do, roll around in the dirt?”
“Care to dance?” Jace snarled, standing up from the table.
Adrien looked taken aback, but only for a moment. “Gladly,” he
said.
Jace offered his hand, mostly to keep it from doing something
violent, but he wasn’t gentle in yanking Adrien toward the dance floor.
When he swung around, he expected to see Adrien wearing amusement,
or maybe anger. Instead his eyes were downcast, his feet finding the
rhythm. When he looked up, there was hurt in his eyes.
“Did you know he was coming?” Adrien shouted.
Jace could barely hear him, so he moved closer, placing his hands on
Adrien’s hips and bringing them close to his own. “I had no idea, I
swear.”
Their bodies swung and swayed as if they were having a grand ol’
time, but Jace suspected he looked just as unhappy as his boyfriend did
now.
Adrien moved his lips close to Jace’s ear.
“You talked to Greg on the phone before he came down,” Adrien
said. “He didn’t mention Victor?”
Jace pulled away, shook his head, tried to show his own puzzlement.
Adrien didn’t look convinced.
“I didn’t know!” Jace shouted. “So stop being a dick to me.”
Whatever sympathy he was hoping to win was ruined when he added,
“And stop being a dick to him.”
Adrien broke body contact, spun around, let himself get wrapped up
in the music. He danced this way through the next two songs, Jace letting
him work out his frustrations. The third song was one they both knew—
had danced to before on a night that had been filled with laughter and
sweat. Adrien made eye contact again, placed a hand on the back of
Jace’s neck to draw him near. The glare had disappeared. That was
progress.
“I didn’t know,” Jace repeated.
Adrien nodded, finally believing him. “Are you glad?”
Jace glanced toward the table, or tried to, but the layers of gyrating
bodies made it impossible to see. “It’s awkward as hell,” he shouted.
Then he placed his head alongside Adrien’s. “Just be civil. For me.
They’ll be gone Sunday morning.”
When he pulled back, Adrien rolled his eyes, but in a jokey “oh fine”
sort of way. Good. Crisis averted. That was until the true source of all
their problems came sauntering up.
“Yo, Adrien!” a voice boomed, doing a poor impersonation of
Sylvester Stallone.
Adrien winced like he did every time Greg made this joke, but his
eyes softened as he looked Greg over. In fact, he positively lit up when
Greg spoke next.
“Mind if I cut in?”
“Feel free!” Adrien said, but his thrill faded when it became clear
Greg intended to dance with Jace. Before Jace could utter a single word,
Adrien turned and disappeared into the crowd.
Greg smiled, looking like the king of the frat boys, ready to shake his
money maker and see what it attracted. When he started to do just that,
thrusting hips in his direction, Jace decided he’d had enough. Grabbing
Greg by the arm, he dragged him toward the back of the bar, heading for
a glowing red exit sign.
Once they were outside, Jace breathed in the cool air, trying to calm
down. He didn’t want to yell at Greg, especially after having a few
drinks. He knew how ugly alcohol could turn the simplest of
disagreements, but they needed to talk. Now.
“What are you doing?” he said.
Greg tried to play innocent, but stopped when he saw Jace’s
expression. “You needed to see him again.”
“Why?” Jace insisted. “What’s changed? Not Victor, that’s for sure.”
“He has a job now,” Greg said.
Jace felt like he’d been punched in the stomach. “What?”
Greg nodded. “To help take care of his mom. He didn’t tell you?”
Jace shook his head.
“That’s why I wanted you guys to have more alone time. You need
to give him another chance.”
“Need?” Okay, now Jace was getting angry. “I have a boyfriend!”
“Adrien is an asshole,” Greg muttered. Then he added, “No offense.”
“Can you blame him for acting that way? How would you feel if a
girl’s ex-boyfriend showed up out of the blue? Brought by the person
who was supposed to be your best friend!”
“I’m a naughty boy!” Greg said, but his smile faded when he saw
this only made Jace angrier. “You can do better. You know I got along
with Adrien on my previous visits. I know he’s not always that bad, but
he isn’t… He’s not good enough. Not for someone like you.”
Jace took a deep breath. “You said the same thing about Victor
once.”
“I know.” Greg kicked at the ground. “But he really has changed.”
“He still won’t move here. I asked him.”
Greg raised his head. “You did?”
Jace snorted. “Almost immediately, because I figured that’s what this
was about.”
“Oh. What did he say?”
“What do you think?”
“The thing is,” Greg said, revving back up, “you’re graduating soon.
We both are. So I mean, you could move back. Maybe not to
Warrensburg, but there’s always Kansas City. Or maybe St. Louis,
although that’s pretty far away and the drive would get old, but I’d still
make it. If we took turns visiting each other, it wouldn’t be so bad.”
Jace stared. Then he sighed. “Are you seriously telling me that
you’ve done all this just to get me to move home?”
Greg’s shoulders rose and fell. “Well, yeah. That’s a big part of it.
But I also think Victor is a good guy. We’ve been hanging out more, and
I figured maybe he’s finally ready for you. He sure talks about you a lot.”
“He’s always loved me,” Jace said. “That wasn’t the issue.”
“Yeah, I know,” Greg said reluctantly. “But—”
“I’m staying.” Jace said it firmly. “I like Texas. And I know Adrien
can be a pain in the ass, but he wants to be with me and only me.”
Greg scowled. “I bet if I—eh, forget it.”
“What, you’re going to seduce him just to prove me wrong?” Jace
chuckled. “By all means, go ahead! But you’ll have to go all the way to
prove it to me. All the way.”
Greg pretended to mull it over “Would I get to be the guy?”
Jace smirked. “Trust me, Adrien wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“Nah, I’d rather seduce you.”
“You’re not my type,” Jace lied. Greg was nearly everyone’s type.
“But you can help me salvage the night by dancing with Adrien. That
should cheer him up.”
“Yeah, all right.” Greg flexed a muscle casually. “A guy like me is
used to being treated like a piece of meat.”
“And no more trying to force Victor and me together,” Jace said.
“We had our shot already. Once was enough.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Greg looked like a chastised puppy. “That’s what he
kept saying on the drive down. Although he didn’t say once was enough.
Do you want to know what he said?”
“No.” Jace told himself to go back in the club, to forget about it. He
even made it to the door. Then he sighed. “Okay, what?”
“Victor said that nothing had ended. Not for him. He still loves you.”
Greg let that sink in a moment. “Then he started rattling on about how,
since it was never a relationship in his mind, that there wasn’t anything
to end. Or something. That part wasn’t as romantic. Forget I mentioned
it.”
Jace laughed, shook his head ruefully, and opened the door,
reentering a world of superficial beats. Later, when the bar had mostly
cleared out and Adrien still gleefully held Greg prisoner on the dance
floor, Jace caught Victor’s eye and they both smiled in amusement.
Victor was right. Relationships come and go, but the feelings that power
them, those stay forever.
* * * * *
Jace had a simple fantasy, one that was fairly innocent, especially for
a guy strolling into a hotel without his boyfriend. Of course it helped that
the sun was shining, the air still early-morning fresh. This made it feel
less sultry. Besides, he knew he wouldn’t find Victor. Or if he did, Victor
wouldn’t be alone.
Jace tried the breakfast buffet first.
“Room number?” a young lady asked, clipboard in hand.
“Six oh two,” Jace murmured, distracted by who he saw sipping
coffee by a window.
“Go ahead, Mr. Trout,” the lady said, gesturing toward the food.
“Thanks,” Jace said, stifling a laugh when the conversation caught
up with him. He’d be eating Greg’s breakfast for him. His stomach
rumbled, his body craving something greasy like it always did the
morning after he drank. He wasn’t hungover, exactly. He’d stopped
drinking after his conversation with Greg outside the club, wanting to be
in full control of his actions. Jace loaded up on hash browns and eggs,
grabbing an orange juice on the way to the table.
He sat down without announcing himself, reveling in Victor’s
surprise since it happened so rarely.
“Greg sleeping it off?” Jace asked.
Victor nodded. “And where’s your date?” he asked without looking
around for Adrien.
“The same.”
“Ah.”
Jace felt his face flush. Just the idea of them being together, alone,
despite being surrounded by feasting travelers, felt so… Ugh. This was
silly.
“Interesting smile,” Victor said.
Jace didn’t realize he had been. The smile didn’t go away, even
when he willed it to. “It’s just odd seeing you here. This isn’t the sort of
environment I ever pictured you in.”
“Odder than seeing me at a gay bar, like last night?” Victor picked at
a half-eaten bagel. “Besides, you know how I feel about free food. I’m
loading up my pockets on the way out.”
“That’ll be interesting when it comes to the scrambled eggs.”
“Those I’ll hide like a hamster does,” Victor said, blowing up his
cheeks with air. “I figure I can get two handfuls in.”
“Or you can come live with me and I’ll cook you all the eggs you
can eat, every single morning.” Jace focused suddenly on dousing his
hash browns with ketchup. “Uh, can we rewind that real quick and make
it an internal monologue?”
“I still would have heard you thinking it,” Victor said, winking at
him. “I’m psychic, remember?”
“So what am I thinking now?” Jace said, locking eyes with him, but
for once his thoughts were fairly quiet. Instead he felt a mix of emotions.
Desire, mostly, with a tinge of sorrow. The balance started to shift the
more he examined Victor’s face and realized that he would soon be out
of his life again.
Victor was the first to break eye contact, looking down at his coffee.
“We’re not going to give Greg the satisfaction of winning, are we?”
