Jace stepped close, putting his shoe next to Ben’s. “I’m a size eleven,
so I’m guessing you’re… nine? Does that sound right?”
“Yes,” Ben said, sounding relieved. “Nine and a half.”
They were finally at the window. Jace rattled off their shoe sizes and
paid, winking at Ben during the brief wait. As soon as they were on the
rink, he’d be in his element again. Moving a little farther away, they sat
to put on their skates. He glanced over to see how Ben was doing and
their eyes met.
“Are you any good at this?” Ben asked.
“Oh, I do all right.” Jace yanked his laces tight, then noticed Ben’s
skates. “Wait. You missed a rung and the tongue is stuffed in. Here.”
He got on one knee, flashing Ben a smile before he undid the laces
and wove them up again. Ben’s cheeks flushed. Closet case, shyness, or
maybe he wasn’t interested anymore? There was so much Jace didn’t
know. Including Ben’s age. Helping him with his shoes was giving Jace
a little-brother vibe. Surely he was legal. Right? The skates laced and
tied, he stood and offered his hand.
Ben accepted it, letting Jace pull him to his feet. Once he was up,
Jace loosened his grip enough that Ben could pull his hand away if he
wanted. But he didn’t. Together they wobbled to the edge of the rink.
Ben eyed the ice with transparent apprehension. “I really can’t ice
skate at all. I did once when I was eight, and all I remember is falling on
my ass until I finally gave up.”
“You didn’t have me then.” Jace saw interest in Ben’s smile. Feeling
encouraged, he stepped out onto the ice. “Ready?”
Ben followed experimentally, releasing his hand to grab the side of
the rink. “Uh,” he said.
Jace laughed. “Hold on to me. I won’t let you fall.”
This time Ben took his elbow. They made it a few feet before Ben
started to slip. Jace placed a helpful arm around him, hoping this didn’t
seem like an excuse to grope Ben. Not that it couldn’t be. Rather than let
his mind go there, Jace focused on coaching. Regardless of how much he
demonstrated the right way, or tried to get him to relax, Ben’s feet kept
slipping out from under him. So maybe he wasn’t the athletic type, but
Ben laughed at himself every time he messed up, his eyes lighting up
with joy. Jace liked that.
Eventually, Ben relaxed enough to release Jace’s arm. Taking his
hand instead, their fingers interlocked. Jace set a slow steady rhythm so
Ben wouldn’t have trouble keeping up.
“This is nice,” Ben said. “Anywhere else and people would be
staring at us, but here we have a reason to hold on to each other.”
Busted. “I have to admit that was part of the plan, but I don’t need a
pretense to hold another guy’s hand in public. Let people stare if they
want.”
Ben glanced at him. “Where were you when I was in high school?”
“I was wondering that myself. You look much younger now that you
aren’t suffering through a late flight.”
“Oh. I just turned twenty. You?”
Legal, thank goodness, but twenty seemed a long time ago to Jace.
“A little bit older than that.”
“Thirty?”
“Hey!” Jace shook his hand free from Ben, skating away from him.
Thirty? Seriously? He let Ben struggle, punishment for his insolence,
only coming to his rescue again when Ben’s arms started pinwheeling.
“I’m only twenty-six!”
“Well, you were the one acting dramatic about it,” Ben teased.
“What do you like better anyway? Younger or older?”
“Doesn’t matter. It’s the personality that counts. Mind if I do a
couple of rounds on my own?”
“Sure.”
Jace took Ben to the rail again before skating into the lane of traffic.
After going slow, breaking free without restrictions felt good. Jace glided
past more cautious skaters and considered what he’d learned. Six years
was a big age difference. Seven years come April. He tried to imagine
being twenty again, college age. Would he have liked being with
someone so much older? In his mind, he aged Adrien. No more dorm
room. Adrien would have his own apartment and full-time work. That
would have been nice. They’d been so tight on space and money. Instead
of them both freaking out when finals came around, only one of them
would have been stressed. Also nice. But he wondered if Ben liked to
party, if he was truly interested in finding the right person to settle down
with. Did anyone really expect to meet the love of their life while in
college?
Jace knew he wouldn’t have minded. As for Ben… Well, skating
solo wouldn’t answer any of his questions. He found Ben bravely trying
to make a round on his own. Ben smiled at him proudly, Jace nodding his
approval before leading the way to the exit. Time to see how they would
do without this distraction.
“Hungry?” Jace asked.
“Starving,” Ben replied.
Yup. Definitely a college boy. This was the first question Jace asked
when they were seated at a seafood restaurant not far away. The ride over
in Jace’s car had been a little quiet, but the awkward edge was definitely
gone now.
“So I take it you’re still in college?” Jace asked.
“Yeah, up at Columbia College in Chicago.”
“How do you like it?”
Ben shrugged. “It’s all right.”
“I couldn’t wait to get out,” Jace said. “The only good thing about
college was having four extra years to figure out what I wanted to do.”
“I didn’t know flight attendants went to college,” Ben said, a foot-inmouth
expression following shortly.
“It’s not a requirement. It’s just that— Well, what do you want to be
when you grow up? What’s your major?”
“I have no idea.” Ben chuckled. “It changes on a daily basis.”
“There you go. Paying tuition is just an expensive way of buying
time.”
Ben chatted him up about his job, which most people did out of
politeness, but he seemed genuinely interested. Jace was happy to talk
about his career, since he was proud of it. Eventually, he became tired of
the sound of his own voice. He wanted to know more about Ben.
“So what’s it like growing up in Chicago?”
“No idea,” Ben said. “I’m an imposter. I’m actually from here.”
“Oh, that’s right,” Jace said. “You mentioned your parents lived in
the area. Columbia must be a good college, then. Out-of-state tuition is a
bitch.”
“Don’t remind me,” Ben said. “And yeah, it’s a good school, but
mostly I just wanted to get away.”
Jace fought down a grin. Sounds like they had something in
common. “What exactly were you trying to escape?”
Ben exhaled. “More like a who.”
“What was his name?”
Ben shook his head. “Doesn’t matter. And it wasn’t really him,
anyway. I was sick of being the gay guy, you know? I came out when I
was in junior high—”
“Seriously?”
Ben nodded. “I was fourteen and some of my friends were…
experimental.”
“Ah.”
Ben’s cheeks flushed. “Yeah. I thought what we were doing was
normal, and I was the first to put a name to it. I was young and na.ve
enough to think they’d be happy I figured it out for us, but us soon
became just me. That dividing line remained all through high school, and
by the end of it, I was desperate to get out of there.”
Jace frowned. “So you’re not open in your new school?”
Ben snorted. “Are you kidding? I go to an art school. Being gay is
practically a requirement for admission.”
Jace chuckled appreciatively.
“No, I’m definitely open,” Ben said. “I never regretted coming out. I
just got sick of feeling like I was the only one who had gotten over it,
you know. To everyone else, it was a big deal. To me, being gay is just
part of who I am. So when I could move on, I did.”
“I can relate,” Jace said. “I’m also an imposter.”
Ben raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”
“Yup. Born and raised in Missouri.” He said it with a country twang,
pronouncing the state’s name like the natives sometimes did: Miz-zurruh.
Ben grinned, brushing a lock of hair behind one ear. “So what were
you running away from?”
“A boy. Of course I ended up running back to him a few times. How
about you?”
Ben shook his head, seeming uncomfortable with the subject, so Jace
changed it.
“So if you’re enrolled in art school, what’s your secret talent?”
“Finger-painting,” Ben said with a straight face. Then he smiled and
softly sang, “You’ll find out when I sing for my supper.”
“Wow.” Jace leaned back. “That was nice. Sing some more.”
Ben opened his mouth just as the waitress approached with their
food. He shrugged apologetically. “Eating and singing don’t go together
well. Not unless you have a protective tarp handy.”
While they ate, Jace asked more about Ben’s school, and his life in
Chicago. Jace had been there for work, allowing them to compare notes.
When they were finished with their meal, he brought the conversation
back to Houston again.
“Do you get along with your family?” he asked.
Ben nodded happily. “Yeah, my parents are great. They’ve always
been supportive. Barely blinked an eye when I came out. They helped get
me through the hard times. Allison too. That’s my friend who lost her
father. You’ll have to meet her.” Ben narrowed his eyes playfully. “If
you make the cut.”
“How am I doing so far?”
“Well, you haven’t asked me what I’m into. That’s good.”
Jace groaned. “I know exactly what you mean. The first time a guy
asked me that, I rattled off my hobbies. Then he started talking about…
uh, well things you’d have to wear a glove to do.”
Ben grimaced. “That’s taking the question literally. He was into you.
Or wanted to be.”
Jace laughed. “I left him wanting. Anyway, that’s why I made sure
before this date that we were on the same page.”
Ben looked shocked. “Wait, this is a date?”
“Yes. Whether you like it or not.”
“Good,” Ben said. “On both accounts. I like taking it slow. Part of
me doesn’t, but the rest of me knows it’s better that way. I should at least
know the guy’s last name, right?”
There was an awkward pause.
“Holden,” Jace said at the same time Ben said “Bentley.” Then they
both laughed. Jace signaled the waitress and ordered dessert. He was
already stuffed but didn’t want the meal to end just yet. They talked more
about their families and friends, describing their lives through the people
around them rather than trying to do the impossible and explain who they
were. Hopefully they would find that out as they went along. When the
waitress asked for the third time if there was anything else they needed,
Jace gave up trying to prolong the inevitable and paid. The night was too
late for a movie, and they were both driving so drinks were out. There
wasn’t anything left to do besides take Ben back to the mall.
Once there, they chatted a little longer next to Ben’s car, both of
them distracted by what should happen next. Taking it slow was one
thing, but no successful date ended without a goodnight kiss. The only
problem was trying to segue into an appropriately romantic moment.
Standing in an empty parking lot certainly didn’t help.
“This is no place for a first kiss,” Jace said in frustration. “You could
come home with me, meet the cat.”
Ben smiled. “Not on the first date.”
“Nothing has to happen,” he said, not wanting the night to end.
“Trust me, if I get you somewhere private, something will happen.”
Jace’s pulse kicked into high gear. “Well, well! I guess that means I
get to see you again?”
“How about Thursday?”
Three days away? Jace was hoping for something sooner, but then
again, he still had to entertain Michelle and her family. “It’s a deal.
Look, I’m kissing you tonight, but I refuse to do it here. Just follow me
in your car for a minute, and I promise I’ll let you go home afterwards.”
Ben grew somber and nodded. “Okay.”
Both in their cars, they drove a few blocks, Jace racking his brain for
an environment even remotely romantic. A river glistening with reflected
stars, or a garden filled with roses. In the end, he settled for a public
park. Ben’s car parked behind his. Jace could only imagine what Ben
was thinking, but at least he got out of his car instead of driving away.
Ben definitely didn’t seem convinced. “Are you sure about this?” he
asked.
“No,” Jace said, glancing around. “I’m improvising. Over there.”
Taking Ben’s hand, they strolled together toward a baseball
diamond. Also not an arena known for romantic potential. There was the
pitcher’s mound, which seemed tasteless, or home base, which was kind
of funny. This gave him an idea. Jace led them to one point of the
diamond outline.
“First base?” Ben asked. “You’ve got to be kidding.”
“I assure you,” Jace said, pulling Ben close, “I’m quite serious.”
Before he could second-guess himself, or worry if this was too fast
for Ben, Jace brought their lips together. The world shrank down to this
moment, distant sounds and distracting thoughts going mute. Jace
pressed his body close to Ben’s, kissing him deeper and tasting a hint of
the lemon sherbet he’d had for dessert. Or maybe Ben always tasted like
that—citrus fresh and candy sweet. Jace was only sure of one thing:
Ending the kiss was difficult indeed!
“Second base is just over there,” Ben said with a wry smile.
“Not on the first date.” Jace took one step back as if to avoid an
explosion. He stroked his thumb against Ben’s cheek before gesturing
toward the cars with his head. Together they slowly strolled back.
“I was just kidding about the taking it slow stuff,” Ben said.
“You weren’t.”
“No, I wasn’t. But that was before we kissed. You can tell how
compatible you are with someone by kissing, don’t you think?”
Jace thought about it. “Depends what you mean by compatible.”
“You can tell if you have potential,” Ben explained. “For love or a
relationship or whatever.”
“What’s the whatever?” Jace asked.
“I don’t know.” Ben laughed nervously, taking hold of his arm. “My
last boyfriend had a lip piercing, which was distracting, and he tasted like
smoke the first time we kissed. That didn’t work out. Another guy I was
with for a long time, kissing him was almost electric.”
“So it’s like palm reading but with your lips?”
