Alas honest Buffalmaco, answered the Physitian, thou art not halfe
acquainted with me as yet: because I walke with gloves upon my
hands, and in a long Gowne, thou perhappes doest imagine mee a
faint-hearted fellow. If thou didst know, what I have heeretofore done
at Bologna in the night time, when I and my Consorts went to visite
pretty wenches, thou wouldst wonder at my couragious attempts. As I am
a Gentleman, one night, we met with a young Bona Roba, a paltry
greene-sicknesse baggage, scarsely above a Cubite in height, and
because she refused to go with us willingly, I gave her a kicke on the
bum, and spurnde her more then a Crosse-bowe shoote in distance from
me, and made her walke with us whether she would, or no. Another
time I remember, when having no other company but my boy, I went
thorow the Churchyard of the Fryars Minors, after the sounding of
Ave Maria: a woman hadde beene buried there the very same day, and yet
I was not a jotte affraid.
Wherefore, never be distrustfull of mee, but resolvedly builde
upon my courage. And in regard of my more honourable entertainment,
I will then weare my Scarlet Gowne and Hood, wherein I receyved my
graduation; and then do both of you observe, what a rejoycing will
be among the whole company, at the entertaining of such a man as I am,
enough to create me Captaine immediatly. You shall perceive also how
the case will go, after I have beene there but a while, in regard that
the Countesse (having as yet never seene me) is so deepely enamored of
mee: she cannot choose but bestow the Bathe and Knighthood on me,
which shee shall have the more honour of, in regard I am well able
to maintaine it, therefore referre all the rest to mee, and never
misdoubt your injurie or mine.
Spoken like a Gallant, replyed Buffalmaco, and I feare not now,
but we shall winne credite by your company. But be carefull I pray
you, that you make not a mockery of us, and come not at all, or
fayle to be there, when the Beast shall be sent for you; I speake it
the rather, because it is cold weather, and you Gentlemen Physitians
can hardly endure it. You are carefull of mee (quoth the Doctor) and I
thanke you for it, but I applaud my faire Starres, I am none of your
nice or easie-frozen fellowes, because cold weather is very familiar
to me. I dare assure you, when I arise in the night time for that
naturall office whereto all men are subject, I weare no warmer
defence, then my thin wastcoat over my shirt, and finde it
sufficient for the coldest weather at any time. When Bruno and
Buffalmaco had taken their leave, the Physitian, so soone as night
drew neere, used many apt excuses to his wife, stealing forth his
Scarlet Gowne and Hood unseene of any, wherewith being clothed: at the
time appointed, he got upon one of the Marble Tombes, staying there
(quaking with cold) awaiting when the Beast should come. Buffalmaco,
being a lusty tall man of person, had got an ugly masking suite,
such as are made use of in Tragedies and Playes, the out-side being of
black shagged haire, wherwith being cloathed, he seemed like a strange
deformed Beare, and a Divels vizard over his face, with two gastly
horrible hornes, and thus disguised, Bruno following him, they went to
behold the issue of the businesse, so farre as the new Market place,
closely adjoining to Santa Maria Novella.
Having espyed Master Doctor uppon the Tombe, Buffalmaco in his
mishapen habite, began to bound, leape, and carriere, snuffling and
blowing in mad and raging manner: which when the Physitian saw, his
haire stood on end, he quaked and trembled, as being more fearfull
then a Woman, wishing himselfe at home againe in his house, rather
then to behold a sight so dreadfull. But because he was come forth,
and had such an earnest desire, to see the wonders related to him;
he made himselfe so coragious as possibly he could, and bare all out
in formall manner. After that Buiffalmaco had (an indifferent while)
plaide his horsetrickes, ramping and stamping somewhat strangely:
seeming as become of much milder temper, he went neere to the Tomb
whereon the Physitian stood, and there appeared to stay contentedly.
Master Doctor, trembling and quaking still extreamely, was so
farre dismayed, as he knew not what was best to be done, either to
mount on the beasts backe, or not to mount at all. In the end,
thinking no harme could happen to him, if he were once mounted, with
the second feare, hee expelled the former, and descending downe softly
from the Tombe, mounted on the beast, saying out alowde: God, Saint
Dominicke, and my good Angell helpe to defend mee. Seating himselfe so
well as he could, but trembling still exceedingly; he crossed his
armes over his stomacke, according to the Lesson given him.
Then did Buffalmaco shape his course in milde manner, toward Santa
Maria della Scala, and groping to finde his way in the darke, went
on so farre as the Sisters of Ripole, commonly called the Virgin
Sanctuary. Not farre off from thence, were divers trenches and
ditches, wherein such men as are imployed in necessary
nightservices, used to empty the Countesse di Cimillari, and afterward
imployed it for manuring Husbandmens grounds. Buffalmaco, being come
neere one of them, he stayed to breath himselfe awhile, and then
catching fast hold on one of the Doctours feete, raysed him somewhat
higher on his back, for the easier discharging of his burthen, and
so pitched him (with his head forwardes) into the Laystall.
Then began he to make a dreadful kinde of noise, stamping and
trampling with his feete, passing backe againe to Santa Maria della
Scala, and to Prato d'Ognissanti, where hee met with Bruno, who was
constrained to forsake him, because he could not refraine from lowde
Laughter, then both together went backe once more, to see how the
Physitian would behave himselfe, being so sweetely embrued.
Master Doctor, seeing himselfe to bee in such an abhominable
stinking place, laboured with all his utmost endevour, to get
himself released thence: but the more he contended and strove for
getting forth, he plunged himselfe the further in, being most
pitifully myred from head to foot, sighing and sorrowing
extraordinarily, because much of the foule water entred in at his
mouth. In the end, being forced to leave his hood behinde him,
scrambling both with his hands and feet, he got landing out of his
stinking Labyrinth, and having no other means, home he returned to his
own house, where knocking at the door he was at length admitted
entrance. The doore being scarse made fast againe after his letting
in, Buffalmaco and Bruno were there arrived, listning how M. Doctor
should bee welcomd home by his angry wife: who scolding and railing at
him with wonderfull impatience, gave him most hard and bitter
speeches, terming him the vilest man living.
Where have you bin Sir? quoth she. Are you becom a night-walker
after other Women? And could no worse garments serve your turne, but
your Doctors gown of Scarlet? Am I to suffer this behaviour? Or am not
I sufficient to content you, but you must be longing after change? I
would thou hadst bin stifled in that foule filth, where thy fouler
life did justly cast thee. Behold goodly Master Doctor of the
Leystall, who being maried to an honest woman must yet go abroad in
the night time, insatiatly lusting after whores and harlots. With
these and the like intemperate speeches, she ceased not to afflict and
torment him, till the night was almost spent, and the Doctor brought
into a sweeter savour.
The next morning, Bruno and Buffalmaco, colourd their bodyes with
a strange kinde of painting, resembling blisters, swellings, and
bruises, as if they had bin extreamly beaten; came to the Physitians
house, finding him to be newly up, al the house yet smelling of his
foule savour (although it had bin very well perfumed) and being
admitted to him in the Garden, hee welcommed them with the mornings
salutations. But Bruno and Buffalmaco (being otherwise provided for
him) delivering stearne and angry lookes, stamping and chafing,
Bruno thus replyed.
Never speake so faire and flattering to us, for we are moved
beyond all compasse of patience. All misfortunes in the worlde fall
upon you, and an evill death may you dye, like the most false and
perfidious Traitor living on the earth. We must beate our braines, and
move all our most endeared friends, onely for your honor and
advancement: while wee were well neere starved to death in the cold
like Dogs, and, by your breach of promise, have bin this night so
extreamly beaten, as if (like Asses) we should have beene driven to
Rome.
But that which is most greevous of all, is danger of excluding out
of the Society, where wee tooke good order for your admittance, and
for your most honourable entertainment. If you wi not credit us,
behold our bodies, and let your owne eyes be witnesses, in what cruell
manner we have bin beaten. So taking him aside under the Gallery,
where they might not be discovered by overmuch light, they opened
their bosomes, shewing him their painted bodies, and sodainly closed
them up againe.
The Physitian laboured to excuse himselfe, declaring his misfortunes
at large, and into what a filthy place he was throwne. It maketh no
matter (answered Buffalmaco) I would you had bin throwen from off
the Bridge into Arno, where you might have beene recommended to the
Divell and all his Saints. Did not I tell you so much before. In
good sadnesse (quoth the Doctor) I neyther commended my selfe to
God, nor any of his Saints. How? sayde Buffalmaco, I am sure you
will not maintaine an untruth, you used a kind of recommendation:
for our messenger told us, that you talked of God, S. Dominicke, and
your good Angell, whom you desired to assist you, being so
affrighted with feare, that you trembled like a leafe upon a tree, not
knowing indeede where you were. Thus have you unfaithfully dealt
with us, as never any man shall doe the like againe, in seeking
honour, and losing it through your own negligence.
Master Doctor humbly entreated pardon, and that they would not
revile him any more, labouring to appease them by the best words he
could use, as fearing least they should publish this great disgrace of
him. And whereas (before) he gave them gracious welcomes; now he
redoubled them with farre greater courtesies, feasting them daily at
his own table, and evermore delighting in their company. Thus (as
you have heard) two poore Painters of Florence, taught Master Doctor
better Wit, then all the Learned at Bologna.
THE EIGHT DAY, THE TENTH NOVELL
WHEREBY APPEARETH, THAT SUCH AS MEET WITH CUNNING HARLOTS, AND
SUFFER THEMSELVES TO BE DECEIVED BY THEM: MUST SHARPEN THEIR WITS,
TO MAKE THEM REQUITALL IN THE SELFESAME KINDE
A Cicilian Courtezane, named Madame Biancafiore, by her craftie
wit and policie, deceived a young Merchant, called Salabetto, of all
the money he had taken for his Wares at Palermo. Afterward, he
making shew of comming hither againe, with farre richer Merchandises
then hee brought before: made the meanes to borrow a great summe of
Money of her, leaving her so base a pawne, as well requited her for
her former cozenage.
Needlesse it were to question, whether the Novell related by the
Queene, in divers passages thereof, mooved the Ladies to hearty
laughter, and likewise to compassionate sighes and teares; as pittying
Madame Helena in her hard misfortune, and yet applauding the
Scholler for his just revenge. But the discourse being ended, Dioneus,
who knew it was his Office to be the last speaker every day, after
silence was commanded, he began in this manner.
Worthy Ladies, it is a matter very manifest, that deceits do appeare
so much the more pleasing, when (by the selfesame meanes) the subtle
deceyver is artificially deceived. In which respect, though you all
have reported very singular deceits: yet I meane to tel you one,
that may prove as pleasing to you, as any of your owne. And so much
the rather, because the woman deceived, was a great and cunning
Mistris in beguiling others; equalling (if not excelling) any of
your former beguilers.
It hath bene observed heretofore, and (happily) at this very day
it is as frequent, that in all Cities and Townes upon the Seacoasts,
having Ports for the benefit and venting Merchandises; Merchants use
to bring their wealthy laden Vessels thither. And when they unlade any
Ship of great fraught, there are prepared Store-houses, which in
many places are called Magazines or Doganaes, at the charge of the
Communalty, or Lord of the Towne or City, for the use whereof, they
receive yearly gain and benefit. Into those warehouses, they deliver
(under writing, and to the owners of them in especiall charge) all
their goods and merchandises, of what price or valew soever they are.
Such as be the Owners of these Magazines, when the Wares are thus
stored uppe in them, doe safely locke them up there with their
keyes, having first registred downe truly all the goods, in the
Register belonging to the Custome-house, that the Merchant may have
a just account rendred him, and the rights payed to the
Customehouse, according to the Register, and as they are either in
part, or in all made sale of.
Brokers are continually there attending, being informed in the
quality of the Merchandises stored, and likewise to what Merchants
they appertaine: by meanes of these men, and according as the goods
come to their hands, they devise to have them exchaunged, trucked,
vented, and such other kinds of dispatches, answerable to the mens
minds, and worth of the Commodities. As in many other Kingdomes and
Countries, so was this custome observed at Palermo in Sicily, where
likewise then were, and (no doubt) now adayes are, store of Women,
faire and comely of person, but yet vowed enemies to honesty.
Neverthelesse, by such as know them not, they are held and reputed
to be blamelesse Women, and by yeilding their bodyes unto generall
use, are the occasion of infinite misfortunes to men. For so soone
as they espy a Merchant-stranger there arrived, they win information
