But you must have an especiall care afterward, being providently wise,
least you fall into the like follies againe. Concerning the
preparation of this precious drinke, halfe a dozen of Capons, the very
fairest and fattest, I must make use of in the distillation: what
other things shall bee imployed beside, you may deliver forty Florines
to one of these your honest friends, to see all the necessaries bought
and sent me home to my house. Concerning my businesse, make you no
doubt thereof, for I will have all distilled against to morrow, and
then doe you drinke a great Glasse full every morning, fresh and
fasting next your heart. Calandrino was highly pleased with his words,
returning master Doctor infinite thankes, and referring all to his
disposing. And having given forty Florines to Bruno, with other
money beside, to buy the halfe dozen of Capons: he thought himselfe
greatly beholding to them all, and protested to requite their
kindenesse.
Master Doctor being gone home to his house, made ready a bottel of
very excellent Hypocrasse, which he sent the next day according to his
promise: and Bruno having bought the Capons, with other junkets, fit
for the turne, the Phisitian and his merry Companions, fed on them
hartely for the givers sake. As for Calandrino, he liked his dyet
drinke excellently well, quaffing a large Glassefull off three
mornings together: afterward Master Doctor and the rest came to see
him, and having felt his pulse, the Phisition said. Calandrino, thou
art now as sound in health, as any man in all Florence can be: thou
needest not to keepe within doores any longer, but walke abroad
boldly, for all is well and the childe gone.
Calandrino arose like a joyfull man, and walked daily through the
streets, in the performance of such affaires as belonged to him: and
every acquaintance he met withall, he told the condition of his sudden
sickenesse; and what a rare cure Master Doctor Simon had wrought on
him, delivering him (in three dayes space) of a childe, and without
the feeling of any paine. Bruno, Buffalmaco, and Nello, were not a
little jocond, for meeting so well with covetous Calandrino: but how
the Wife liked the folly of her Husband, I leave to the judgement of
all good Women.
THE NINTH DAY, THE FOURTH NOVELL
SERVING AS AN ADMONITION TO ALL MEN, FOR TAKING GAMESTERS
AND DRUNKARDS INTO THEIR SERVICE
Francesco Fortarigo, played away all that he had at Buonconvento,
and likewise the money of Francesco Aniolliero, being his Master. Then
running after him in his shirt, and avouching that hee had robbed him:
he caused him to be taken by Pezants of the Country, clothed
himselfe in his Masters wearing garments, and (mounted on his horse)
rode thence to Sienna, leaving Aniolliero in his shirt, and walked
barefooted.
The ridiculous words given by Calandrino to his Wife, all the
whole company hartily laughed at: but a Philostratus ceassing,
Madame Neiphila (as it pleased the Queene to appoint) began to
speake thus. Vertuous Ladies, if it were not more hard and uneasie for
men, to make good their understanding and vertue, then apparant
publication of their disgrace and folly; many would not labour in
vaine, to curbe in their idle speeches with a bridle, as you have
manifestly observed by the weake wit of Calandrino. Who needed no such
fantastick circumstance, to cure the strange disease, which he
imagined (by sottish perswasions) to have: had hee not been so
lavish of his tongue, and accused his Wife of overmastering him. Which
maketh me remember a Novell, quite contrary to this last related,
namely, how one man may strive to surmount another in malice; yet he
to sustaine the greater harme, that had (at the first) the most
advantage of his enemy, as I will presently declare unto you.
There dwelt in Sienna, and not many yeeres since, two young men of
equall age, both of them bearing the name of Francesco: but the one
was descended of the Aniollieri, and the other likewise of the
Fortarigi; so that they were commonly called Aniolliero, and
Fortarigo, both Gentlemen, and well derived. Now, although in many
other matters, their complexions did differ very much: Yet
notwithstanding, they varied not in one bad qualitie, namely too great
neglect of their Fathers, which caused their more frequent
conversation, as very familiar and respective friends. But
Aniolliero (being a very goodly and faire conditioned young Gentleman)
apparently perceiving, that he could not maintaine himselfe at Sienna,
in such estate as he liked, and upon the pension allowed him by his
Father, hearing also, that at the Marquisate of Ancona, there lived
the Popes Legate, a worthy Cardinall, his much indeared good Lord
and friend: he intended to goe visite him, as hoping to advance his
fortunes by him.
Having acquainted his Father with this determination, he concluded
with him, to have that from him in a moment which might supply his
wants because he would be clothed gallantly, and mounted honourably.
And seeking for a servant necessary to attend on him, it chanced
that Fortarigo hearing thereof, came presently to Aniolliero,
intreating him in the best manner he could, to let him waite on him as
his serving man, promising both dutiful and diligent attendance: yet
not to deaund any other wages, but onely payment of his ordinary
expences. Aniolliero made him answere, that he durst not give him
entertainment, not in regard of his insufficiency, and unaptnesse
for service: but because he was a great Gamester, and divers times
would be beastly drunke? whereto Fortarigo replyed that hee would
refraine from both those foule vices, and addict all his endeavor
wholly to please him, without just taxation of any grosse errour;
making such solemne vowes and protestations beside, as conquered
Aniolliero, and won his consent.
Being entred upon his journey, and arriving in a morning at
Buonconvento, there Aniolliero determined to dine, and afterward,
finding the heate to be unfit for travaile; he caused a bed to be
prepared, wherein being laid to rest by the helpe of Fortarigo, he
gave him charge, that after the heates violence was overpast, hee
should not faile to call and awake him. While Aniolliero slept thus in
his bed, Fortarigo, never remembring his solemne vowes and promises:
went to the Taverne, where having drunke indifferently, and finding
company fit for the purpose, he fell to play at the dice with them. In
a very short while, he had not onely lost his money, but all the
cloathes on his backe likewise, and coveting to recover his losses
againe; naked in his shirt, he went to Aniollieroes Chamber, where
finding him yet soundly sleeping, he tooke all the money he had in his
purse, and then returned backe to play, speeding in the same manner as
hee did before, not having one poore penny left him.
Aniolliero chancing to awake, arose and made him ready, without
any servant to helpe him; then calling for Fortarigo, and not
hearing any tydings of him: he began immediately to imagine, that he
was become drunke, and so had falne asleepe in one place or other,
as very often he was wont to doe. Wherefore, determining so to leave
him, he caused the male and Saddle to be set on his horse, and so to
furnish himselfe with a more honest servant at Corsignano.
But when hee came to pay his hoste, hee found not any penny left
him: whereupon (as well he might) he grew greatly offended, and raised
much trouble in the house, charged the hoasts people to have robde
him, and threatening to have them sent as prisoners to Sienna.
Suddenly entred Fortarigo in his shirt, with intent to have stolne
Aniollieroes garments, as formerly hee did the money out of his purse,
and seeing him ready to mount on horsebacke, hee saide.
How now Aniolliero? What shall we goe away so soone? I pray you
Sir tarry a little while, for an honest man is comming hither, who
hath my Doublet engaged for eight and thirty shillings; and I am
sure that he will restore it me back for five and thirty, if I could
presently pay him downe the money.
During the speeches, an other entred among them, who assured
Aniolliero, that Fortarigo was the Thiefe which robde him of his
money, shewing him also how much hee had lost at the Dice: Wherewith
Aniolliero being much mooved, very angerly reprooved Fortarigo, and,
but for feare of the Law, would have offered him outrage, thretning to
have him hangd by the neck, or else condemned to the Gallies belonging
to Florence, and so mounted on his horse. Fortarigo making shew to the
standers by, as if Aniolliero menaced some other body, and not him,
said. Come Aniolliero, I pray thee let us leave this frivilous
prating, for (indeede) it is not worth a Button, and minde a matter of
more importance: my Doublet will bee had againe for five and thirty
shillings, if the money may bee tendered downe at this very instant,
whereas if we deferre it till to morrow, perhaps hee will then have
the whole eight and thirty which he lent me, and he doth me this
pleasure, because I am ready (at another time) to affoord him the like
courtesie; why then should we loose three shillings, when they may
so easily be saved.
Aniolliero hearing him speake in such confused manner, and
perceiving also, that they which stood gazing by, beleeved (as by
their lookes appeared) that Fortarigo had not played away his
Masters mony at the Dice, but rather that he had some stocke of
Fortarigoes in his custody; angerly answered; Thou sawcy companion,
what have I to doe with thy Doublet? I would thou wert hangd, not only
for playing away my money, but also by delaying thus my journey, and
yet boldly thou standest out-facing mee, as if I were no better then
thy fellow. Fortarigo held on still his former behaviour, without
using any respect or reverence to Aniolliero, as if all the
accusations did not concerne him, but saying, Why should wee not
take the advantage of three shillings profit? Thinkest thou, that I am
not able to doe as much for thee? why, lay out so much money for my
sake, and make no more haste then needs we must, because we have
day-light enough to bring us (before night) to Torreniero. Come,
draw thy purse, and pay the money, for upon mine honest word, I may
enquire throughout all Sienna, and yet not find such another Doublet
as this of mine is. To say then, that I should leave it, where it
now lyeth pawned, and for eight and thirty shillings, when it is
richly more worth then fifty, I am sure to suffer a double
endammagement thereby.
You may well imagine, that Aniolliero was now enraged beyond all
patience, to see himselfe both robde of his money, and overborne
with presumptuous language: wherefore, without making any more
replications, he gave the spurre to his horse, and rode away towards
Torreniero. Now fell Fortarigo into a more knavish intention against
Aniolliero, and being very speedy in running, followed apace after him
in his shirt, crying out still aloude to him all the way, to let him
have his Doublet againe. Aniolliero riding on very fast, to free his
eares from this idle importunity, it fortuned that Fortarigo espied
divers countrey Pezants, laboring in the fields about their businesse,
and by whom Aniolliero (of necessity) must passe: To them he cryed out
so loude as he could; Stay the thiefe, Stop the Thiefe, he rides
away so fast, having robde me.
They being provided, some with Prongges, Pitchforkes and Spades, and
others with the like weapons fit for Husbandry, stept into the way
before Aniolliero: and beleeving undoubtedly, that he had robde the
man which pursued him in his shirt, stayed and apprehended him.
Whatsoever Aniolliero could doe or say, prevailed not any thing with
the unmannerly Clownes, but when Fortarigo was arrived among them,
he braved Aniolliero most impudently, saying.
What reason have I to spoyle thy life (thou traiterous Villaine)
to rob and spoyle thy Master thus on the high way? Then turning to the
Countrey Boores: How much deare friends (quoth he) am I beholding to
you for this unexpected kindnesse? You behold in what manner he left
me in my Lodging, having first playd away all my money at the Dice,
and then deceiving me of my horse and garments also: but had not you
(by great good lucke) thus holpe mee to stay him; a poore Gentleman
had bin undone for ever, and I should never have found him againe.
Aniolliero avouched the truth of his wrong received, but the base
peazants, giving credite onely to Fortarigoes lying exclamations:
tooke him from his horse, despoyled him of all his wearing
apparrell, even to the very Bootes from off his Legges: suffered him
to ride away from him in that manner, and Aniolliero left so in his
shirt, to dance a bare foote Galliard after him either towards Sienna,
or any place else.
Thus Aniolliero, purposing to visite his Cousin the Cardinal like
a Gallant, and at the Marquisate of Ancona, returned backe poorly in
his shirt unto Buonconvento, and durst not (for shame) repaire to
Sienna. In the end, he borrowed money on the other horse which
Fortarigo rode on, and remained there in the Inne, whence riding to
Corsignano, where he had divers Kinsmen and Friends, he continued
there so long with them, till he was better furnished from his Father.
Thus you may perceive, that the cunning Villanies of Fortarigo,
hindred the honest intended enterprise of Aniolliero howbeit in fit
time and place, nothing afterward was left unpunished.
THE NINTH DAY, THE FIFT NOVELL
IN JUST REPREHENSION OF THOSE VAINEHEADED FOOLES, THAT ARE
LED AND GOVERNED BY IDLE PERSWASIONS
Calandrino became extraordinarily enamoured of a young Damosell,
named Nicholetta. Bruno prepared a Charme or writing for him,
avouching constantly to him, that so soone as he touched the
Damosell therewith, she should follow him whithersoever hee would have
her. She being gone to an appointed place with him, hee was found
there by his wife, and dealt withall according to his deserving.
Because the Novell reported by Madame Neiphila was so soone
