SUDDEN, PERSONS; WHO BY SOME WITTY WORDS (WHEN ANY HAVE CHECKT OR
RETORTING THEM) HAVE REVENGED THEMSELVES, IN A SUDDEN, UNEXPECTED
AND DISCREET ANSWERE, THEREBY PREVENTING LOSSE, DANGER, SCORNE
AND DISGRACE, RETORTING THEM ON THE BUSI-HEADED QUESTIONERS
The Moone having past the heaven, lost her bright splendor, by the
arising of a more powerfull light, and every part of our world began
to looke cleare: when the Queene (being risen) caused all the
Company to be called, walking forth afterward upon the pearled dewe
(so farre as was supposed convenient) in faire and familiar conference
together, according as severally they were disposed, and repetition of
divers the passed Novels, especially those which were most pleasing,
and seemed so by their present commendations. But the Sunne beeing
somewhat higher mounted, gave such a sensible warmth to the ayre, as
caused their returne backe to the Pallace, where the Tables were
readily covered against their comming, strewed with sweete hearbes and
odoriferous flowers, seating themselves at the Tables (before the heat
grew more violent) according as the Queene commanded.
After dinner, they sung divers excellent Canzonnets, and then some
went to sleepe, others played at the Chesse, and some at the Tables:
But Dioneus and Madam Lauretta, they sung the love-conflict betweene
Troylus and Cressida. Now was the houre come, of repairing to their
former Consistory or meeting place, the Queene having thereto
generally summoned them, and seating themselves (as they were wont
to doe) about the faire fountaine. As the Queene was commanding to
begin the first Novell, an accident suddenly happened, which never had
befalne before: to wit, they heard a great noyse and tumult, among the
houshold servants in the Kitchin. Whereupon, the Queene caused the
Master of the Houshold to be called, demaunding of him, what noyse
it was, and what might be the occasion thereof? He made answere,
that Lacisca and Tindaro were at some words of discontentment, but
what was the occasion thereof, he knew not. Whereupon, the Queene
commanded that they should be sent for, (their anger and violent
speeches still continuing) and being come into her presence, she
demaunded the reason of their discord; and Tindaro offering to make
answere, Lacisca (being somewhat more ancient then he, and of a
fiercer fiery spirit, even as if her heart would have leapt out of her
mouth) turned her selfe to him, and with a scornefull frowning
countenance, said. See how this bold, unmannerly and beastly fellow,
dare presume to speake in this place before me: Stand by (saucy
impudence) and give your better leave to answere; then turning to
the Queene, thus shee proceeded.
Madam, this idle fellow would maintaine to me, that Signior
Sicophanto marrying with Madama della Grazza, had the victory of her
virginity the very first night; and I avouched the contrary, because
shee had been a mother twise before, in very faire adventuring of
her fortune. And he dared to affirme beside, that yong Maides are so
simple, as to loose the flourishing Aprill of their time, in meere
feare of their parents, and great prejudice of their friends.
And then the Queene, somewhat offended at the folly of the former
controversie, commanded Madame Philomena, that she should give
beginning to the dayes Novels: which (in dutifull manner) shee
undertooke to doe, and seating her selfe in formall fashion, with
modest and very gracious gesture, thus she began.
THE SIXT DAY, THE FIRST NOVELL
REPREHENDING THE FOLLY OF SUCH MEN, AS UNDERTAKE TO REPORT
DISCOURSES, WHICH ARE BEYOND THEIR WIT AND CAPACITY, AND
GAINE NOTHING BUT BLAME FOR THEIR LABOUR
A Knight requested Madam Oretta, to ride behinde him on horse-backe,
and promised, to tell her an excellent Tale by the way. But the Lady
perceiving, that his discourse was idle, and much worse delivered:
entreated him to let her walke on foote againe.
Gracious Ladies, like as in our faire, cleere, and serene seasons,
the Starres are bright ornaments to the heavens, and the flowry fields
(so long as the spring time lasteth) weare their goodliest Liveries,
the Trees likewise bragging in their best adornings: Even so at
friendly meetings, short, sweet, and sententious words, are the beauty
and ornament of any discourse, savouring of wit and sound judgement,
worthily deserving to be commended. And so much the rather, because in
few and witty words, aptly suting with the time and occasion, more
is delivered then was expected, or sooner answered, then rashly
apprehended: which, as they become men verie highly, yet do they
shew more singular in women.
True it is, what the occasion may be, I know not, either by the
badnesse of our wittes, or the especiall enmitie betweene our
complexions and the celestiall bodies: there are scarsely any, or very
few Women to be found among us, that well knowes how to deliver a
word, when it should and ought to be spoken; or, if a question bee
mooved, understands to suite it with an apt answere, such as
conveniently is required, which is no meane disgrace to us women.
But in regard, that Madame Pampinea hath already spoken sufficiently
of this matter, I meane not to presse it any further: but at this time
it shall satisfie mee, to let you know, how wittily a Ladie made due
observation of opportunitie, in answering of a Knight, whose talke
seemed tedious and offensive to her.
No doubt there are some among you, who either do know, or (at the
least) have heard, that it is no long time since, when there dwelt a
Gentlewoman in our Citie, of excellent grace and good discourse,
with all other rich endowments of Nature remaining in her, as pitty it
were to conceale her name: and therefore let me tell ye, that shee was
called Madame Oretta, the Wife to Signior Geri Spina. She being upon
some occasion (as now we are) in the Countrey, and passing from
place to place (by way of neighbourly invitations) to visite her
loving Friends and Acquaintance, accompanied with divers Knights and
Gentlewomen, who on the day before had dined and supt at her house, as
now (belike) the selfe-same courtesie was intended to her: walking
along with her company upon the way; and the place for her welcome
beeing further off then she expected; a Knight chanced to overtake
this faire troop, who well knowing Madam Oretta, using a kinde and
courteous salutation, spake thus.
Madam, this foot travell may bee offensive to you, and were you so
well pleased as my selfe, I would ease your journey behinde mee on
my Gelding, even so as you shall command me: and beside, wil shorten
your wearinesse with a Tale worth the hearing. Courteous Sir
(replyed the Lady) I embrace your kinde offer with such acceptation,
that I pray you to performe it; for therein you shall doe me an
especiall favour. The Knight, whose Sword (perhappes) was as
unsuteable to his side, as his wit out of fashion for any readie
discourse, having the Lady mounted behinde him rode on with a gentle
pace, and (according to his promise) began to tell a Tale, which
indeede (of it selfe) deserved attention, because it was a knowne
and commendable History, but yet delivered so abruptly, with idle
repetitions of some particulars three or foure severall times,
mistaking one thing for another, and wandering erroneously from the
essentiall subject, seeming neere an end, and then beginning againe:
that a poore Tale could not possibly be more mangled, or worse
tortured in telling, then this was; for the persons therein concerned,
were so abusively nicke-named, their actions and speeches so
monstrously mishapen, that nothing could appeare to be more ugly.
Madame Oretta, being a Lady of unequalled ingenuitie, admirable in
judgement, and most delicate in her speech, was afflicted in soule,
beyond all measure; overcome with many colde sweates, and passionate
heart-aking qualmes, to see a Foole thus in a Pinne-fold, and unable
to get out, albeit the doore stood wide open to him, whereby shee
became so sicke; that, converting her distaste to a kinde of
pleasing acceptation, merrily thus she spake. Beleeve me Sir, your
horse trots so hard, and travels so uneasily; that I entreate you to
let me walke on foot againe.
The Knight, being (perchance) a better understander, then a
Discourser; perceived by this witty taunt, that his Bowle had run a
contrarie bias, and he as farre out of Tune, as he was from the Towne.
So, lingering the time, untill her company was neerer arrived: hee
lefte her with them, and rode on as his Wisedome could best direct
him.
THE SIXT DAY, THE SECOND NOVELL
APPROVING, THAT A REQUEST OUGHT TO BE CIVILL, BEFORE IT
SHOULD BE GRANTED TO ANY ONE WHATSOEVER
Cistio a Baker, by a wittie answer which he gave unto Messer Geri
Spina, caused him to acknowledge a very indiscreete motion, which he
had made to the said Cistio.
The words of Madame Oretta, were much commended by the men and
women; and the discourse being ended, the Queene gave command to Madam
Pampinea, that shee should follow next in order, which made her to
begin in this manner.
Worthy Ladies, it exceedeth the power of my capacitie, to censure in
the case whereof I am to speake, by saying, who sinned most, either
Nature, in seating a Noble soule in a vile body, or Fortune, in
bestowing on a body (beautified with a noble soule) a base or wretched
condition of life. As we may observe by Cistio, a Citizen of our owne,
and many more beside; for, this Cistio beeing endued with a singular
good spirit, Fortune hath made him no better then a Baker. And beleeve
me Ladies, I could (in this case) lay as much blame on Nature, as on
Fortune; if I did not know Nature to be most absolutely wise, and that
Fortune hath a thousand eyes, albeit fooles have figured her to bee
blinde. But, upon more mature and deliberate consideration, I finde,
that they both (being truly wise and judicious) have dealt justly,
in imitation of our best advised mortals, who being uncertaine of such
inconveniences, as may happen unto them, do bury (for their own
benefit) the very best and choicest things of esteeme, in the most
vile and abject places of their houses, as being subject to least
suspition, and where they may be sure to have them at all times, for
supply of any necessitie whatsoever, because so base a conveyance hath
better kept them, then the very best chamber in the house could have
done. Even so these two great commanders of the world, do many times
hide their most precious Jewels of worth, under the clouds of Arts
or professions of worst estimation, to the end, that fetching them
thence when neede requires, their splendor may appeare to be the
more glorious. Nor was any such matter noted in our homely Baker
Cistio, by the best observation of Messer Geri Spina, who was spoken
of in the late repeated Novell, as being the husband to Madame Oretta;
whereby this accident came to my remembrance, and which (in a short
Tale) I will relate unto you.
Let me then tell ye, that Pope Boniface (with whom the fore-named
Messer Geri Spina was in great regard) having sent divers Gentlemen of
his Court to Florence as Ambassadors, about very serious and important
businesse: they were lodged in the house of Messer Geri Spina, and
he employed (with them) in the saide Popes negotiation. It chanced,
that as being the most convenient way for passage, every morning
they walked on foot by the Church of Saint Marie d'Ughi, where
Cistio the Baker dwelt, and exercised the trade belonging to him.
Now although Fortune had humbled him to so meane a condition, yet shee
added a blessing of wealth to that contemptible quality, and (as
smiling on him continually) no disasters at any time befell him, but
still he flourished in riches, lived like a jolly Citizen, with all
things fitting for honest entertainment about him, and plenty of the
best Wines (both White and Claret) as Florence, or any part thereabout
yeelded.
Our frolicke Baker perceiving, that Messer Geri Spina and the
other Ambassadors, used every morning to passe by his doore, and
afterward to returne backe the same way: seeing the season to be
somewhat hot and soultry, he tooke it as an action of kindnesse and
courtesie, to make them an offer of tasting his white wine. But having
respect to his owne meane degree, and the condition of Messer Geri:
hee thought it farre unfitting for him, to be so forward in such
presumption; but rather entred into consideration of some such meanes,
whereby Messer Geri might bee the inviter of himselfe to taste his
Wine. And having put on him a trusse or thin doublet, of very white
and fine Linnen cloath, as also breeches, and an apron of the same,
and a white cap upon his head, so that he seemed rather to be a
Miller, then a Baker: at such times as Messer Geri and the Ambassadors
should daily passe by, hee set before his doore a new Bucket of
faire water, and another small vessell of Bologna earth (as new and
sightly as the other) full of his best and choisest white Wine, with
two small Glasses, looking like silver, they were so cleare. Downe
he sate, with all this provision before him, and emptying his stomacke
twice or thrice, of some clotted flegmes which seemed to offend it:
even as the Gentlemen were passing by, he dranke one or two rouses
of his Wine so heartily, and with such a pleasing appetite, as might
have moved a longing (almost) in a dead man.
Messer Geri well noting his behaviour, and observing the verie
same course in him two mornings together; on the third day (as he
was drinking) he said unto him. Well done Cistio, what, is it good, or
no? Cistio starting up, forthwith replyed; Yes Sir, the wine is good
indeed, but how can I make you to beleeve me, except you taste of
it? Messer Geri, eyther in regard of the times quality, or by reason
of his paines taken, perhaps more then ordinary, or else, because
hee saw Cistio had drunke so sprightly, was very desirous to taste
of the Wine, and turning unto the Ambassadors, in merriment he
