Houndes, Hawkes, and what else not, as having an extraordinary
felicity in all kinds of game, as singular exercises to maintaine
his health.
Among his other Servants and Followers, there was a yong
Gentleman, gracefull of person, excellent in speech, and every way
as active as no man could be more: his name Pyrrhus, highly affected
of Nicostratus, and more intimately trusted then all the rest. Such
seemed the perfections of this Pyrrhus, that Lydia (for so was the
Lady named) began to affect him very earnestly, and in such sort, as
day or night shee could take no rest, but devised all meanes to
compasse her harts desire. Now, whether he observed this inclination
of her towards him, or else would take no notice thereof, it could not
be discerned by any outward apprehension: which moved the more
impatiency in her, and drove her hopes to dispairing passions. Wherein
to finde some comfort and ease, she called an ancient Gentlewoman of
her Chamber, in whom shee reposed especiall confidence, and thus she
spake to her.
Lesca, The good turnes and favours thou hast received from me,
should make thee faithfull and obedient to me: and therefore set a
locke uppon thy lippes, for revealing to any one whatsoever, such
matters as now I shall impart to thee; except it be to him that I
command thee. Thou perceivest Lesca, how youthfull I am, apt to all
sprightly recreations, rich, and abounding in all that a woman can
wish to have, in regard of Fortunes common and ordinary favours: yet I
have one especiall cause of complaint: namely, the inequality of my
Mariage, my Husband being over-ancient for me; in which regard, my
youth finds it selfe too highly wronged, being defeated of those
duties and delights, which Women (farre inferiour to me) are
continuallie cloyed withall, and I am utterly deprived of. I am
subject to the same desires they are, and deserve to taste the benefit
of them, in as ample manner, as they do or can.
Hitherto I have lived with the losse of time, which yet (in some
measure) may be releeved and recompenced: For, though Fortune were
mine enemy in Mariage, by such a disproportion of our conditions:
yet she may befriend in another nature, and kindely redeeme the injury
done me. Wherefore Lesca, to be as compleate in this case, as I am
in all the rest beside; I have resolved upon a private Friend, and one
more worthy then any other, Namely, my Servant Pyrrhus, whose youth
carieth some correspondency with mine; and so constantly have I setled
my love to him, as I am not well, but when I thinke on him, or see
him: and (indeede) shall dye, except the sooner I may enjoy him. And
therefore, if my life and well-fare be respected by thee, let him
understand the integrity of mine affection, by such good means as thou
findest it most expedient to be done: entreating him from me, that I
may have some conference with him, when he shall thereto be
solicited by me.
The Chamber-Gentlewoman Lesca, willingly undertooke the Ladies
Embassie; and so soone as opportunity did favor her: having withdrawne
Pyrrhus into an apt and commodious place, shee delivered the Message
to him, in the best manner she could devise. Which Pyrrhus hearing,
did not a little wonder thereat, never having noted any such matter;
and therefore sodainly conceyved, that the Lady did this onely to
try him; whereupon, somewhat roundly and roughly, hee returned this
answere. Lesca, I am not so simple, as to credite any such Message
to be sent from my Lady, and therefore be better advised of thy words.
But admit that it should come from her, yet I cannot be perswaded,
that her soule consented to such harsh Language, far differing from
a forme so full of beuty. And yet admit againe, that her hart and
tongue herein were relatives: My Lord and Master hath so farre
honoured mee, and so much beyond the least part of merite in mee: as I
will rather dye, then any way offer to disgrace him: And therefore I
charge thee, never more to move mee in this matter.
Lesca, not a jot danted at his stearne words, presently she saide.
Pyrrhus, Both in this and all other Messages my Lady shall command me,
I wil speake to thee whensoever shee pleaseth, receive what discontent
thou canst thereby; or make presumption of what doubts thou maist
devise. But as I found thee a senselesse fellow, dull, and not
shaped to any understanding, so I leave thee: And in that anger parted
from him, carrying backe the same answer to her Lady. She no sooner
heard it, but instantly shee wished her selfe to be dead; and within
some few dayes after, she conferred againe with her Chamber-woman,
saying. Lesca, thou knowest well enough, that the Oxe falleth not at
the first blow of the Axel neither is the victory won, upon a silly
and shallow adventure: Wherefore, I thinke it convenient, that once
more thou shouldst make another tryall of him, who (in prejudice to
me) standeth so strictly on his loyalty, and choosing such an houre as
seemeth most commodious, soundly possesse him with my tormenting
passions. Bestirre thy Wittes, and tippe thy tongue with a Womans
eloquence, to effect what I so earnestly desire: because, by
languishing in this lovesicke affliction, it will bee the danger of my
death, and some severe detriment to him, to be the occasion of so
great a losse.
Lesca, comforted her Lady, so much as lay in her power to doe, and
having sought for Pyrrhus, whom she found at good leysure; and, in a
pleasing humor, thus she beganne. Pyrrhus, some few dayes since I
tolde thee, in what extreame Agonies thy Lady and mine was, onely in
regarde of her love to thee: and now againe I come once more, to
give thee further assurance thereof: Wherefore, beleeve it
unfeignedly, that if thy obstinacie continue still, in like manner
as the other day it did, expect very shortly to heare the tydings of
her death.
It is my part therefore, to entreat thee, to comfort her long
languishing desires: but if thou persist in thy harsh opinion, in
stead of reputing thee a wise and fortunate yong man, I shall confesse
thee to bee an ignoraunt Asse. What a glorie is it to thee, to be
affected of so faire and worthy a Lady, beyond all men else
whatsoever? Next to this, tell me, how highly maist thou confesse
thy self beholding to Fortune, if thou but duly consider, how shee
hath elected thee as sole soveraigne of her hopes, which is a crowne
of honour to thy youth and a sufficient refuge against all wants and
necessities? Where is any to thy knowledge like thy selfe, that can
make such advantage of his time, as thou maist do, if thou wert
wise? Where canst thou find any one to go beyond thee in Armes,
Horses, sumptuous garments, and Gold, as will be heaped on thee, if
Lydia may be the Lady of thy love? Open then thine understanding to my
words, returne into thine owne souie, and bee wise for thy selfe.
Remember (Pyrrhus) that Fortune presents her selfe but once before
any one, with cheerefull lookes, and her lappe wide open of richest
favours, where if choice be not quickely made, before she folde it up,
not quic and turn her backe; let no complaint afterward be made of
her, if the Fellow that had so faire an offer, proove to be miserable,
wretched, and a Begger, only thorow his owne negligence. Beside,
what else hath formerly bin saide, there is now no such neede of
loyaltie in servants to their Ladies, as should be among deare Friends
and Kindred: but servants ought rather (as best they may) be such to
their Masters, as they are to them. Doest thou imagine, that if thou
hadst a faire Wife, Mother, Daughter, or Sister, pleasing in the eye
of our Nicostratus; he would stand on such nice tearmes of duty or
Loyaltie, as now thou doest to his Ladie? Thou wert a verie foole to
rest so perswaded. Assure thy selfe, that if entreaties and faire
means might not prevalle, force, and compulsion (whatsoever ensued
thereon) woulde winne the masterie. Let us then use them, and the
commodities unto them belonging, as they would us and ours. Use the
benefit of thy Fortune, and beware of abusing her favour. She yet
smiles on thee; but take heede least she turne her backe, it will then
be over-late to repent thy folly. And if my Ladie die through thy
disdaine, be assured, that thou canst not escape with life, beside
open shame and disgrace for ever.
Pyrrhus, who had often considered on Lescaes first message,
concluded with himselfe; that if any more she moved the same matter:
hee would returne her another kinde of answere, wholly yeelding to
content his Lady; provided, that he might remaine assured,
concerning the intyre truth of the motion, and that it was not urged
onely to trie him, wherefore, thus he replyed. Lesca, do not imagine
mee so ignorant, as not to know the certaintie of all thy former
allegations, confessing them as freely as thou doest, or canst. But
yet let mee tell thee withall, that I knowe my Lord to be wise and
judicious, and having committed all his affaires to my care and trust:
never blame mee to misdoubt, least my Ladie (by his counsell and
advice) make thee the messenger of this motion, therby to call my
Fidelitie in question.
To cleare which doubt, and for my further assurance of her well
meanning toward me; if she wil undertake the performance of three such
things as I must needes require in this case: I am afterward her owne,
in any service she can command me. The first of them, is; that in
the presence of my Lord and Master, she kill his faire Faulcon,
which so dearly hee affecteth. The second, to send me a locke or
tuft of his beard, being puld away with her owne hand. The third and
last, with the same hand also, to pluck out one of his best and
soundest teeth, and send it mee as her loves true token. When I
finde all these three effectually performed, I am wholly hers, and not
before.
These three strict impositions, seemed to Lesca, and her Ladie
likewise, almost beyond the compasse of all possibility. Nevertheles
Love, being a powerfull Oratour in perswading, as also adventurous
even on the most difficult dangers; gave her courage to undertake them
all: sending Lesca backe againe to him, with full assurance, of
these more then Herculean labours. Moreover, her selfe did intend to
adde a fourth taske, in regard of his strong opinion concerning the
great Wisedome of his Lord and Maister. After she had effected all the
other three, she would not permit him to kisse her, but before his
Lords face: which yet should be accomplished in such sort, as
Nicostratus himselfe should not beleeve it, although apparantly he saw
it. Well, (quoth Pyrrhus) when all these wonders are performed, assure
my Ladie. that I am truelie hers.
Within a short while after, Nicostratus made a solemne Feastival
(accorling as yearely he used to doe) in honour of his birth day,
inviting many Lords and Ladies thereto. On which rejoycing day, so
soone as dinner was ended, and the Tables withdrawne: Lydia came
into the great Hall, where the Feast was solemnly kept; very rich
and costly apparrelled; and there, in presence of Pyrrhus, and the
whole assemblie, going to the Perch whereon the Faulcone sate, wherein
her Husband tooke no little delight, and having untyed her, as if shee
meant to beare her on her Fist: tooke her by the jesses, and beating
her against the wal, killed her. Nicostratus beholding this, called
out aloud unto her, saying. Alas Madame! What have you done? She
making him no answere, but turning to the Lords and Ladies, which
had dined there, spake in this manner.
Ill should I take revenge on a King, that had offended me, if I
had not so much heart, as to wreake my spleene on a paltry Hawke.
Understand then, worthy Lords and Ladies, that this Faulcone hath long
time robbed me of those delights, which men (in meere equitie) ought
to have with their wives: because continually, so as breake of day
hath appeared, my Husband, starting out of bed, makes him selfe
readie, presently to Horsse, and with this Faulcon on his Fist,
rides abroad to his recreation in the Fields. And I, in such
forsaken sort as you see, am left all alone in my bed, discontented
and despised: often vowing to my selfe, to bee thus revenged as now
I am, being with-held from it by no other occasion, but onely want
of a fit and apt time, to do it in the presence of such persons, as
might bee just judges of my wrongs, and as I conceive you all to be.
The Lords and Ladies hearing these words, and beleeving this deed of
hers to be done no otherwise, but out of her entire affection to
Nicostratus, according as her speeches sounded: compassionately
turning towards him (who was exceedingly displeased) and all
smiling, said. Now in good sadnesse Sir; Madame Lydia hath done well
in acting her just revenge upon the Hawke, that bereft her of her
Husbands kinde companie; then which nothing is more precious to a
loving wife, and a hell it is to live without it. And Lydia, being
sodainly with. into her chamber; with much other friendly and familiar
talke, they converted the anger of Nicostratus into mirth and smiling.
Pyrrhus, who had diligently observed the whole cariage of this
businesse, saide to himselfe. My Ladie hath begun well, and proceeding
on with no worse successe, will (no doubt) bring her love to an
happy conclusion. As for the Lady her selfe, she having thus kild
the Hawke, it was no long while after, but being in the Chamber with
her husband, and they conversing familiarly together; she began to
jest with him, and hee in the like manner with her, tickling and
toying each the other, till at the length she played with his beard,
and now she found occasion aptly serving, to effect the second taske
imposed by Pyrrhus. So, taking fast hold on a small tuft of his beard,
she gave a sodaine snatch, and plucked it away quite from his chin.
Whereat Nicostratus beeing angerly moved, she (to appease his
distaste) pleasantly thus spake. How now my Lord? Why do you looke
so frowningly? What? Are you angry for a few loose haires of your
beard? How then should I take it, when you plucke mee by the haire
of my head, and yet I am not a jot discontented, because I know you do
