it would break her heart if she knew that I suffered anybody else to do
for me what her little hands could undertake. I don't consider!'--he
cried with sudden querulousness, 'why, God knows that this one child is
the thought and object of my life, and yet he never prospers me--no,
never!'
At this juncture, the subject of our conversation again returned, and
the old man motioning to me to approach the table, broke off, and said
no more.
We had scarcely begun our repast when there was a knock at the door by
which I had entered, and Nell bursting into a hearty laugh, which I was
rejoiced to hear, for it was childlike and full of hilarity, said it
was no doubt dear old Kit coming back at last.
'Foolish Nell!' said the old man fondling with her hair. 'She always
laughs at poor Kit.'
The child laughed again more heartily than before, and I could not help
smiling from pure sympathy. The little old man took up a candle and
went to open the door. When he came back, Kit was at his heels.
Kit was a shock-headed, shambling, awkward lad with an uncommonly wide
mouth, very red cheeks, a turned-up nose, and certainly the most
comical expression of face I ever saw. He stopped short at the door on
seeing a stranger, twirled in his hand a perfectly round old hat
without any vestige of a brim, and resting himself now on one leg and
now on the other and changing them constantly, stood in the doorway,
looking into the parlour with the most extraordinary leer I ever
beheld. I entertained a grateful feeling towards the boy from that
minute, for I felt that he was the comedy of the child's life.
'A long way, wasn't it, Kit?' said the little old man.
'Why, then, it was a goodish stretch, master,' returned Kit.
'Of course you have come back hungry?'
'Why, then, I do consider myself rather so, master,' was the answer.
The lad had a remarkable manner of standing sideways as he spoke, and
thrusting his head forward over his shoulder, as if he could not get at
his voice without that accompanying action. I think he would have
amused one anywhere, but the child's exquisite enjoyment of his oddity,
and the relief it was to find that there was something she associated
with merriment in a place that appeared so unsuited to her, were quite
irresistible. It was a great point too that Kit himself was flattered
by the sensation he created, and after several efforts to preserve his
gravity, burst into a loud roar, and so stood with his mouth wide open
and his eyes nearly shut, laughing violently.
The old man had again relapsed into his former abstraction and took no
notice of what passed, but I remarked that when her laugh was over, the
child's bright eyes were dimmed with tears, called forth by the
fullness of heart with which she welcomed her uncouth favourite after
the little anxiety of the night. As for Kit himself (whose laugh had
been all the time one of that sort which very little would change into
a cry) he carried a large slice of bread and meat and a mug of beer
into a corner, and applied himself to disposing of them with great
voracity.
'Ah!' said the old man turning to me with a sigh, as if I had spoken to
him but that moment, 'you don't know what you say when you tell me that
I don't consider her.'
'You must not attach too great weight to a remark founded on first
appearances, my friend,' said I.
'No,' returned the old man thoughtfully, 'no. Come hither, Nell.'
The little girl hastened from her seat, and put her arm about his neck.
'Do I love thee, Nell?' said he. 'Say--do I love thee, Nell, or no?'
The child only answered by her caresses, and laid her head upon his
breast.
'Why dost thou sob?' said the grandfather, pressing her closer to him
and glancing towards me. 'Is it because thou know'st I love thee, and
dost not like that I should seem to doubt it by my question? Well,
well--then let us say I love thee dearly.'
'Indeed, indeed you do,' replied the child with great earnestness, 'Kit
knows you do.'
Kit, who in despatching his bread and meat had been swallowing
two-thirds of his knife at every mouthful with the coolness of a
juggler, stopped short in his operations on being thus appealed to, and
bawled 'Nobody isn't such a fool as to say he doosn't,' after which he
incapacitated himself for further conversation by taking a most
prodigious sandwich at one bite.
'She is poor now'--said the old man, patting the child's cheek, 'but I
say again that the time is coming when she shall be rich. It has been a
long time coming, but it must come at last; a very long time, but it
surely must come. It has come to other men who do nothing but waste and
riot. When WILL it come to me!'
'I am very happy as I am, grandfather,' said the child.
'Tush, tush!' returned the old man, 'thou dost not know--how should'st
thou!' then he muttered again between his teeth, 'The time must come, I
am very sure it must. It will be all the better for coming late'; and
then he sighed and fell into his former musing state, and still holding
the child between his knees appeared to be insensible to everything
around him. By this time it wanted but a few minutes of midnight and I
rose to go, which recalled him to himself.
'One moment, sir,' he said, 'Now, Kit--near midnight, boy, and you
still here! Get home, get home, and be true to your time in the
morning, for there's work to do. Good night! There, bid him good night,
Nell, and let him be gone!'
'Good night, Kit,' said the child, her eyes lighting up with merriment
and kindness.
'Good night, Miss Nell,' returned the boy.
'And thank this gentleman,' interposed the old man, 'but for whose care
I might have lost my little girl to-night.'
'No, no, master,' said Kit, 'that won't do, that won't.'
'What do you mean?' cried the old man.
'I'd have found her, master,' said Kit, 'I'd have found her. I'll bet
that I'd find her if she was above ground, I would, as quick as
anybody, master. Ha, ha, ha!'
Once more opening his mouth and shutting his eyes, and laughing like a
stentor, Kit gradually backed to the door, and roared himself out.
Free of the room, the boy was not slow in taking his departure; when he
had gone, and the child was occupied in clearing the table, the old man
said:
'I haven't seemed to thank you, sir, for what you have done to-night,
but I do thank you humbly and heartily, and so does she, and her thanks
are better worth than mine. I should be sorry that you went away, and
thought I was unmindful of your goodness, or careless of her--I am not
indeed.'
I was sure of that, I said, from what I had seen. 'But,' I added, 'may
I ask you a question?'
'Ay, sir,' replied the old man, 'What is it?'
'This delicate child,' said I, 'with so much beauty and
intelligence--has she nobody to care for her but you? Has she no other
companion or advisor?'
'No,' he returned, looking anxiously in my face, 'no, and she wants no
other.'
'But are you not fearful,' said I, 'that you may misunderstand a charge
so tender? I am sure you mean well, but are you quite certain that you
know how to execute such a trust as this? I am an old man, like you,
and I am actuated by an old man's concern in all that is young and
promising. Do you not think that what I have seen of you and this
little creature to-night must have an interest not wholly free from
pain?'
'Sir,' rejoined the old man after a moment's silence. 'I have no right
to feel hurt at what you say. It is true that in many respects I am the
child, and she the grown person--that you have seen already. But waking
or sleeping, by night or day, in sickness or health, she is the one
object of my care, and if you knew of how much care, you would look on
me with different eyes, you would indeed. Ah! It's a weary life for an
old man--a weary, weary life--but there is a great end to gain and that
I keep before me.'
Seeing that he was in a state of excitement and impatience, I turned to
put on an outer coat which I had thrown off on entering the room,
purposing to say no more. I was surprised to see the child standing
patiently by with a cloak upon her arm, and in her hand a hat, and
stick.
'Those are not mine, my dear,' said I.
'No,' returned the child, 'they are grandfather's.'
'But he is not going out to-night.'
'Oh, yes, he is,' said the child, with a smile.
'And what becomes of you, my pretty one?'
'Me! I stay here of course. I always do.'
I looked in astonishment towards the old man, but he was, or feigned to
be, busied in the arrangement of his dress. From him I looked back to
the slight gentle figure of the child. Alone! In that gloomy place all
the long, dreary night.
She evinced no consciousness of my surprise, but cheerfully helped the
old man with his cloak, and when he was ready took a candle to light us
out. Finding that we did not follow as she expected, she looked back
with a smile and waited for us. The old man showed by his face that he
plainly understood the cause of my hesitation, but he merely signed to
me with an inclination of the head to pass out of the room before him,
and remained silent. I had no resource but to comply.
When we reached the door, the child setting down the candle, turned to
say good night and raised her face to kiss me. Then she ran to the old
man, who folded her in his arms and bade God bless her.
'Sleep soundly, Nell,' he said in a low voice, 'and angels guard thy
bed! Do not forget thy prayers, my sweet.'
'No, indeed,' answered the child fervently, 'they make me feel so
happy!'
'That's well; I know they do; they should,' said the old man. 'Bless
thee a hundred times! Early in the morning I shall be home.'
'You'll not ring twice,' returned the child. 'The bell wakes me, even
in the middle of a dream.'
With this, they separated. The child opened the door (now guarded by a
shutter which I had heard the boy put up before he left the house) and
with another farewell whose clear and tender note I have recalled a
thousand times, held it until we had passed out. The old man paused a
moment while it was gently closed and fastened on the inside, and
satisfied that this was done, walked on at a slow pace. At the
street-corner he stopped, and regarding me with a troubled countenance
said that our ways were widely different and that he must take his
leave. I would have spoken, but summoning up more alacrity than might
have been expected in one of his appearance, he hurried away. I could
see that twice or thrice he looked back as if to ascertain if I were
still watching him, or perhaps to assure himself that I was not
following at a distance. The obscurity of the night favoured his
disappearance, and his figure was soon beyond my sight.
I remained standing on the spot where he had left me, unwilling to
depart, and yet unknowing why I should loiter there. I looked wistfully
into the street we had lately quitted, and after a time directed my
steps that way. I passed and repassed the house, and stopped and
listened at the door; all was dark, and silent as the grave.
Yet I lingered about, and could not tear myself away, thinking of all
possible harm that might happen to the child--of fires and robberies
and even murder--and feeling as if some evil must ensue if I turned my
back upon the place. The closing of a door or window in the street
brought me before the curiosity-dealer's once more; I crossed the road
and looked up at the house to assure myself that the noise had not come
from there. No, it was black, cold, and lifeless as before.
There were few passengers astir; the street was sad and dismal, and
pretty well my own. A few stragglers from the theatres hurried by, and
now and then I turned aside to avoid some noisy drunkard as he reeled
homewards, but these interruptions were not frequent and soon ceased.
The clocks struck one. Still I paced up and down, promising myself that
every time should be the last, and breaking faith with myself on some
new plea as often as I did so.
The more I thought of what the old man had said, and of his looks and
bearing, the less I could account for what I had seen and heard. I had
a strong misgiving that his nightly absence was for no good purpose. I
had only come to know the fact through the innocence of the child, and
though the old man was by at the time, and saw my undisguised surprise,
he had preserved a strange mystery upon the subject and offered no word
of explanation. These reflections naturally recalled again more
strongly than before his haggard face, his wandering manner, his
restless anxious looks. His affection for the child might not be
inconsistent with villany of the worst kind; even that very affection
was in itself an extraordinary contradiction, or how could he leave her
thus? Disposed as I was to think badly of him, I never doubted that his
love for her was real. I could not admit the thought, remembering what
had passed between us, and the tone of voice in which he had called her
by her name.
'Stay here of course,' the child had said in answer to my question, 'I
always do!' What could take him from home by night, and every night! I
called up all the strange tales I had ever heard of dark and secret
deeds committed in great towns and escaping detection for a long series
of years; wild as many of these stories were, I could not find one
adapted to this mystery, which only became the more impenetrable, in