她的表情被黑暗染成了灰色，很难看清，但我还是能感觉到她现在的心情有多么不安。也许是为了安慰她，我拿起她一直在收集的一本书。
‘….Been a while, this thing.’
这东西好久不见了
All these gathered books were my stories.
所有这些收集的书籍都是我的故事。
Kim Dok-Ja, 15 years old. 18 years old. 23. 28….
KimDok-Ja，15岁，18岁，23.28..。
I slowly flipped through the pages.
我慢慢地翻着书页。
Kim Dok-Ja, who didn’t have a father.
KimDok-Ja，没有父亲。
Kim Dok-Ja, who didn’t have any friends.
金道子，他没有任何朋友。
Kim Dok-Ja, who lost his mother.
金道子，他失去了他的母亲。
It was a life that always lacked something, or something kept disappearing from it.
这种生活总是缺少一些东西，或者一些东西总是从中消失。
⸢A lone existence is a being that doesn’t exist. Kim Dok-Ja was always alone. And that was why he was the only child (dokja/獨子), and the ‘Kim Dok-Ja’ didn’t exist.⸥
孤独的存在是不存在的存在。金道子总是一个人。这就是为什么他是唯一的孩子(dokja/something)，而“KimDok-Ja”并不存在的原因。
What sorrowfully reasonable words those were.
这些话是多么令人悲伤、多么有道理的话。
⸢However, there was a sole moment where that Kim Dok-Ja did exist; that was when the dokja (only child/獨子) became the dokja (reader/讀者).⸥
然而，有一个时刻KimDok-Ja确实存在，那就是当dokja(onlychild/somethingsomething)变成dokja(reader/something)。
A life story being told like a lengthy report on a single book, that was basically my life in a nutshell. I spent my teenage years along with the ‘Ways of Survival’, and hid behind the wall this story created for me to dodge the pointed fingers of other people.
一个人生故事就像一本书的冗长报告一样被讲述，简而言之，这就是我的生活。我花了我的青少年时间和“生存之道”一起度过，藏在这个故事为我创造的墙后面，以躲避其他人的指责。
⸢At last. He’d come to life only when reading the ‘Way of Survival’.⸥
最后，他只有在阅读《生存之道》的时候才活了过来
I sensed Yu Sang-Ah’s gaze, staring at me from my side. I wasn’t sure why, but it also felt like it wasn’t her alone; maybe, other Librarians were also watching me from somewhere within the darkness.
我感觉到余相娥的凝视，从我身边凝视着我。我不知道为什么，但也感觉不只是她一个人;也许，其他图书管理员也在黑暗中的某个地方监视着我。
It was right then, an unexpected text caught my eyes within the opened page.
就在那时，一条意想不到的短信在打开的页面里吸引了我的眼球。
⸢I met a strange person today during the interview. That person’s name is Yu Sang-Ah.⸥
我今天在采访中遇到了一个陌生人，那个人的名字叫于相雅
The moment I read that, I unknowingly closed the book shut.
我一看到这封信，就不知不觉地合上了书。
….Could it be that, Yu Sang-Ah-ssi also read this part?
...是不是余桑阿斯也读了这个部分？
⸢(Haven’t you ever wondered about this before, Dok-Ja-ssi?)⸥
(你以前没有想过这个问题吗，Dok-Ja-ssi?)
‘Excuse me? About what…?’
什么?关于什么...
⸢(What if ‘scenarios’ didn’t start? What would have happened to us?)⸥
(如果“情景”没有开始呢?我们会发生什么?)
I hadn’t thought about that.
我还没想到这一点。
What if, the ‘Ways of Survival’ didn’t become reality back then?
如果生存之道在当时没有成为现实会怎么样？
What if, the novel ‘Ways of Survival’ came to its natural conclusion and time continued to tick by, what would’ve happened to me?
如果小说《生存之道》得到了自然的结局，时间继续流逝，我会怎么样？
….Would I still be alive?
我还会活着吗？
Could I have been able to carry on?
我还能坚持下去吗？
⸢(Would we be still working for the same company as before?)⸥ ‘Well, my contract hadn’t been extended, so…. I guess I might have been searching for a job in other companies.’
(我们还会像以前一样为同一家公司工作吗?)我的合同还没有延长，所以..。我想我可能一直在其他公司找工作。”
Right, I wouldn’t have died that easily. I would’ve thought about dying every now and then, and also, there could’ve been many a day when I fell asleep while re-reading the ‘Ways of Survival’, but…. Yeah, I wouldn’t have died. Not that easily.
对，我不会那么容易死的。我会时不时地想到死亡，而且，也许有很多天我在重读《生存之道》时睡着了，但是.....。是啊我就不会死了。没那么容易。
I’d have continued to live on, somehow.
不管怎样，我会继续活下去。
‘In that world, I wouldn’t have become a friend with you, Yu Sang-Ah-ssi. My workplace would’ve changed, and we wouldn’t have a reason to get in contact with each other, after all.’ ⸢(Even still, wouldn’t we have tried to call each other some times?)⸥
“在那个世界里，我是不会和你成为朋友的，余桑雅斯。我的工作场所会发生变化，毕竟我们没有理由彼此联系。”(即便如此，我们难道不会试着给对方打几次电话吗?)
‘Well….’
“嗯......”
⸢(I think we would have. I’m sure that, even after you left the company, I’d keep on remembering you. You are a strange person, after all.)⸥ ‘….Are you trying to get back at me?’
(我想我们会的。我敢肯定，即使在你离开公司之后，我仍然会记得你。你毕竟是个奇怪的人“你是想报复我吗?”
Yu Sang-Ah formed a refreshing grin and carried on.
于相雅笑了笑，继续说下去。
⸢(I’d probably have gotten curious about your welfare. Is he doing okay? He’s not sick, is he? Did he find a new job? What about marriage…)⸥ ‘I don’t think I’d have gotten married. I couldn’t even take care of myself properly back then.’ ⸢(Well, it’s true that one doesn’t have to get married. I also found it easier to live alone, you see.)⸥
(我可能会对你的幸福感到好奇。他还好吗？他没病吧？他找到新工作了吗？那么婚姻呢......)我不认为我会结婚。那时候我甚至不能好好照顾自己。”(好吧，人们不一定非要结婚，这是事实。我还发现一个人生活更容易。)
‘Even you, Sang-Ah-ssi?’
“包括你，桑阿西?”
⸢(Yes. See, I told you. We’d have been good friends, I think.)⸥
(是的，看，我告诉过你，我想我们会成为好朋友的。)
‘….You really think so?’
“你真的这么想吗?”
⸢(Yes, of course. We’d study Spanish together, enter a rider’s club and ride bicycles together, too….)⸥ ‘Or, to get ready for our old age, we start recommending savings plan or retirement funds.’ ⸢(After we grow old and can’t move anymore, we’d help each other to get to hospitals.)⸥ ‘I guess we could have lived pretty close by, in that case.’ ⸢(Of course. Maybe, we might have lived right next to each other.)⸥
(是的，当然。我们一起学习西班牙语，一起参加骑手俱乐部，一起骑自行车......)或者，为了准备晚年，我们开始推荐储蓄计划或退休基金(等我们老了，再也不能动了，我们就互相帮助去医院。)“如果是那样的话，我想我们可以住得很近。”(当然。也许，我们可能就住在一起。)
We continued to chat away. We talked about things that could no longer be. Things that could never become a reality.
我们继续聊着。我们讨论了一些不可能的事情。那些永远不可能成为现实的东西。
Just like how the ‘Ways of Survival’ was to me once upon a time.
就像很久以前生存之道对我来说一样。
Yu Sang-Ah continued on.
余尚雅继续说道。
⸢(Along with Hui-Won-ssi, Hyeon-Seong-ssi, and Ji-Hye, too…. It’d be wonderful if other kids also lived nearby….. Even Su-Yeong-ssi, too.)⸥
(还有慧媛诗、贤成诗、智慧......如果其他孩子也住在附近就好了......甚至连秀英诗也住在附近。)
Even if such a world did really exist, it was not possible that all of them could be together. Because… they were characters from a novel. They were… ‘….Yes, it’d be really wonderful if that was true.’ ⸢(Ah, Joong-Hyeok-ssi, as well. Although his personality is terrible, he’s a great cook, so I think it’ll be nice to become his friend.)⸥
即使这样的世界真的存在，他们也不可能全部在一起。因为...他们是小说中的人物。他们是......是的，如果那是真的就太好了(啊，还有重赫。虽然他的性格很糟糕，但他是一个很棒的厨师，所以我认为成为他的朋友是件好事
Without a warning, something welled up from deep inside my heart.
在没有任何预兆的情况下，我的内心深处涌出了一些东西。
⸢(Hui-Won-ssi and Hyeon-Seong-ssi would be…. Fufufu, in any case. And so we….. We’d all be growing older, little by little. In a world without scenarios, no Constellations, and no Dokkaebis. Where we’d meet up to share our stories, and while sharing nice foods….)⸥
(许元诗和贤成诗会..。不管怎么说，是福福。所以我们..。我们都会一点一点变老。在一个没有场景的世界里，没有星座，也没有多卡比斯。在那里我们会聚在一起分享我们的故事，同时分享美食......)
I recalled the countless world-lines that I witnessed together with the ‘Secretive Plotter’. Among all those possible worlds, maybe, just maybe, one of them could… ⸢(It’d been nice if such a world existed somewhere. Don’t you agree?)⸥ ‘There might be one just like that, somewhere.’
我回想起与“秘密策划者”一起见证的无数世界线索。在所有这些可能的世界中，也许，只是也许，其中一个可以......(如果这样的世界存在于某个地方就好了。你不同意吗?)可能在某个地方也有一个这样的
⸢(Dok-Ja-ssi.)⸥
(Dok-Ja-ssi.)
‘Yes?’
什么事
⸢(I really enjoyed being with you, Dok-Ja-ssi.)⸥
(我真的很喜欢和你在一起，Dok-Ja-ssi。)
‘……..’
’
⸢(I think it’s time for me to go now.)⸥
我想我该走了
‘Yu Sang-Ah-ssi.’
“余桑阿斯。”
Actually, I had realised it a little while ago - why she suddenly began talking to me about such things.
事实上，我早就意识到了——为什么她突然开始跟我谈起这些事情。
[‘Master of the Island’ is calling out to Incarnation ‘Yu Sang-Ah’.]
[“岛主”呼唤道成肉身“余相雅”]
By seizing the opening created by the weakening of [The 4th Wall], the master of these islands was calling out to Yu Sang-Ah.
这些岛屿的主人夺取了[第四道长城]被削弱而形成的开口，向于相雅呼喊。
….The King of the Reincarnators.
转世的国王。
Finally, the moment we’ve been waiting for had come. Indeed, one of the reasons why we decided to come to the Isle of Reincarnators was here.
终于，我们期待已久的时刻到来了。事实上，我们决定来转世岛的原因之一就是这里。
⸢(This Library, it’s a warm and cosy and nice place to be, but… But, I can’t remain here forever, you know.)⸥ ‘But, hang on for a second, Sang-Ah-ssi. You don’t have to be in such a hurry to….!’
(这个图书馆，是一个温暖舒适的好地方，但是......但是，你知道，我不能永远呆在这里。)”“但是，等一下，桑阿西。你不用这么急着去......!”
Yu Sang-Ah shook her head. Just like me, she too had read the ‘Ways of Survival’ by now. What I wanted to say, she already knew them all.
于相娥摇了摇头。和我一样，她现在也读过《生存之道》。我想说的是，她已经全都知道了。
⸢(There is almost nothing that I can do in here. As long as I’m here, I’ll always remain as a simple ‘reader’.)⸥
(在这里我几乎什么也做不了。只要我在这里，我就永远是一个简单的“读者”。)
I looked up at her with a resolute expression, my lips firmly shut.
我抬头看着她，神情坚定，嘴唇紧闭。
I wanted to stop her. I wanted to ask if it’d be fine for us to talk for a bit longer.
我想阻止她。我想问问我们能不能再谈一会儿。
Unfortunately, I couldn’t.
不幸的是，我不能。
⸢(Dok-Ja-ssi, you told me this once before that you have only one turn, and that the world we need to live in is this one. That’s why…. I’ll say it like this.)⸥
(Dok-Ja-ssi，你曾经告诉过我，你只有一次机会，我们需要生活的世界就是这个世界。所以..。我会这样说。)
White light enveloped Yu Sang-Ah as she placed her hand on my head, a smile forming on her lips.
余桑雅把手放在我的头上，嘴角浮现出一丝微笑，白色的光线笼罩着她。
⸢(Let’s meet again in the next life.)⸥ < Episode 70: A story that can’t be shared (3) > Fin.
(让我们下辈子再见)第70集:一个不能分享的故事。
Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint Chapter 372 - A story that can't be shared (4)
