Mike: Yes, everybody on this album died of a drug over dose. Jason: Groovy. Mike: Groovy, that means he likes it. Carol: I wanted to get you something that you could enjoy both as a person and as a psychiatrist. Jason: Well thank you. I am sure that both of me will love it. And it is, ah, two tickets to the On-Broadway production of "Nuts".
Ben: Ok, my turn. Jason: Oh, Ben. Let’s see what do you got me. You wrapped this yourself? Ben: I had it done. Carol: Ahh sweet. He spent all his money on wrappingJason: Ah, Ben, it’s fabulous. Hey,I don’t know what to say. Maggie: Neither do I. I had nothing to do with this. Jason: Sure, you had nothing to do with this. Maggie: Jason, I didn’t. Jason: Ben?
Ben: From god and Mike. All: Mike!
Mike: so as you can see dad, what we have here is a simple little mix up. young Ben didn't realise I was only joking. Now i'm sure you can you see how it happened, particularly since you are a trained psychiatrist. And may I add a damn good one? Carol: How do you do that with a straight face? Mike: It's a gift.
Carol: Ok, that chunk may work on dad, but mom knows raw sewage when she sees it.
Mike: Carol, I am her first born. You mnight say the woman is putty in my hands. Maggie: Oh? Mike: But don’t say that to me because that woman is my mother, and I respect her. Jason: I’m confused ben, I don't get it. I don’t understand how can go door to door, lie the people, take the money in the name of charity and not have it occure to you
that what you were doing was wrong. Ben: It did seem too good to be true. Jason: How could you act so stupidly? Oh, I forgot you got the idea from Mike. Ben: Did I mention that the camera has a soft fine lead?Jason: Ben Ben: and automatic focus?Jason: Really? Ben: Well for once I wanted to get you a real gift.
Maggie: Carol, go to your room. Carol: Why mum? Maggie: Because I said so, young lady. Carol: Well, excuse me then. Mike: Good move, mom. Maggie: Can it Mike. Don’t you know that Ben looks up to you, his big brother, as an example?
Mike: Oh, get out of here! Maggie: I don’t like it any more than you do. Don’t you see the way he tries to talk like you, walk like you, dance like you, do everything like you? Mike: My god. Somebody should set this kid straight. Maggie: Too late. He worships you. Mike: Can we tell him i'm scum or something? Maggie: I did, it only made him more interested. Mike: I'm not sure I can live with this burden.
Carol: It's nine o’clock. Maggie: Oh, I know it honey. I am worried about them too. Carol: Can I come out of my room now? Maggie: Oh, my god. Oh, sure honey, come on down. Ah, sweet heart, I am sorry. I sent you to your room, that was very unfair of me. Carol: Yes, it was. Maggie: Oh, let me tell you a little secret. And this is something that i've never told you kids before. Carol: Yeah? Maggie: I’m…., well, I should just say it, I am not perfect. Carol: Yes, so what is the secret.
Ben: Dad, Jason: Yeah?
Ben: Happy birthday. Jason: Ben, it’s…. Ben: an ashtray. Jason: yeah, I know. What I was going to say was it’s the best birthday present I gotten all year. Ben: But you don’t even smoke. Jason: No, but some of my patience do, some of them want to quit. I think your
ashtray just to might do the trick. Jason: Is this an ashtray or what? Ok stick your butt right on the aorta Maggie: Oh, Jason. You are right about the punishment. I am sorry I went soft on you.Jason: that’s ok, I kind of like you soft Maggie: actually it was pretty nice having you to be the bad cop for a change. Jason: Really? Maggie: you are very sexy when you are strict.
Jason: Well,in that case go to your room young lady. 沪江英语编辑部
Growing Pains 118 V2.0
Mike: The commander of the confederate army was..Bruce Li, Robert Yili Coast, The
Mike: sixty-eight Jason: Oh, Pardon me. Come on,with this exam you have a chance to really improve on that. Aim fo rthe stars, seventy, seventy-five! Mike: I get the feeling you don't think I know this stuff.. Jason: Abraham Lincoln was assassinated...... Mike: True Jason: Well, a very wise man once said that those who don't know their history are doomed to repeat it.
Mike: you mean like in summer school? Jason: Exactly. Mike: Abraham Lincoln was assassinated…while he was still alive!
Maggie: Jason, look! Jason: Wah, Mike is still studying, what do you know! looks like I actually got through to him
Mike: Bed? Come on, How could you think of bed at a time like this? Carol: Watching you wallow in your ignorance is too demoralizing. night!
Mike: OK, well if you're so good at it how do you study? Carol: It’s very simple. I read the material once assigned, I underline the key phrases, and I take careful notes, and I quiz myself. Mike: Underlining!
Next morning Carol: Hi! Jason: Hi! where have you been? Carol: Oh I was up late studyingMaggie: Do you have a test too? Carol: No. Jason: Mike could learn something from her. Carol: No, he couldn’t. en..Bye. Jason: Bye. Maggie: well, I hate to eat and run Jason: but you didn’t finish your eggs Maggie: Well, what I ate was very filling.
Jason: Hi, Ben! Ben: This is breakfast?Jason: Yes. Ben: What’s for lunch? Jason: A surprise. Ben: I hate surprises. What is dad feeding me shoes? Mike: Ben, it’s my bag.
Ben: Why is dad feeding you shoes? Mike: you can’t have it, I need that Ben: Robert yili, Stonewall Jackson, Anpramatics Court House Mike: yeah, they are my buddies, I have them sign them for good luck. Ben: You know something named Anpramatics Court House? Mike: Yeah, black eye, captain in a basketball team.
Mike: ah, Karate, I just kicked over a brick wall Boner: the one thing I know is that I don’t know this. Mike: Oh, my man, you worry too much. Boner: At least I'll have you for company in summer school. Mike: No,no, not this time. I got this thing aced.
Mr. Dewitt: This is multiple choice, and you have 30 minutes and your papers will be graded before you leave. You may begin. Mike: The final Northern battle of civil war was A. battle of Wardroom, B, battle of Gettysburg, C,battle of network stars…Gettysburg
Mike: hay, I actually know this stuff! Mr. Dewitt : now some of your test result did surprise me. For instance, It was interested to learn from Mr.Stoborn that general Grand’s first name was Lu. Boner: I can’t look, I can’t look! I’ve got to look! 67! Oh! All right! Mr. Dewitt: And what is perhaps the biggest shock in my teaching career since boys started wearing earings is that the highest grade in the class, 94, was earnt by Mike Seavor.
Mike: ah, No. 1. Mr.Dewitt: Mr. Seavor, before we schedule a press conference, I have to ask how does a student who’s very name has become synonymous with the phrase “D minus”manage such a grade? Mike: What can I say , Mr. Dewitt when you got it, I got it. Mr. Dewitt: Oh, and now I see where you got it.
Mike: are you actually calling me a cheater?
Boner: No, and you didn't look at the answers on your shoes even once? Mike: Look I'm not kidding around Boner: No, maybe he’s got the room bugged. Of course Mike, you will never cheat. Mike: Look I did not cheat, and I don't want to hear you guys say I did. You got it?
TV program: Five nights this week, the story that had all American reading will have
all American watching, at 18, she was a nun, 21 an acrobat, and 37 the mistress of a president, Jone Collins is…Carol: Old. Hi, Mike Mike: Hi. Carol: What’s the matter? Mike: How do you know something’s the matter? Carol; Because you didn’t say 'hi Fido, hi skunkbreath or hi nerd face. So what is it? Mike: Carol, I’m living in a nightmare. And nobody believes me. And Boner, Eddie, not Cheech, not Murray. Carol: What are you talking about? Mike: Mr. Dewitt accused me of cheating on history exam. Carol: You passed?
Mike: Well, there’s not too much to be said about the test itself.Jason: Ah, say it anyway. Mike: I passed. Maggie: Completely? Mike: Yeah! Jason: Hay, all right, Mike. Maggie: Congratulations!
Jason: I knew that that little extra study would pay off.. Mike: Thanks. But I do have some bad news, and I think you better sit down fo rthis dad. Jason: Would you just say what it is, Mike? Maggie: I have a feeling that you should sit. Mike: Now what I’m about to tell you, It’s going to get both of you quite angry, and you will be outraged at the shoddy treatment I’ve received from Mr. Dewitt. But I want your word that you're not going to go off half copped trying to get this guy fired or something. Jason: I promise to be fully copped, Mike.
Jason: Is this ninety-four out of a hundred? Mike: I swear to you I did not cheat. I give you my word of honor.
Jason: well, I believe you. Mike and Maggie: Really? Jason: Well, if our son gives us his word then we got to believe him. Maggie: You are right, I believe you, Mike. Mike: Oh, thank you. I knew I could count on you guys. I am sorry for every miserable thing I have ever done to make your world a living in hell. Maggie: and I’m sorry I doubted you Mike, but it’s a tough story to believe if you put
yourself in my shoes. Ben: haha, Mom’s shoes aren't big enough for all the answers. Mike: Oh, right, the shoes, Thanks Benny. I forgot to tell you guys the funniest part. You guys are going to love this. Ben: (knocking at the door) Mike! Mike: Benidict Arnold. Ben: Come on, It’s Ben Seavor Mike: Get away! Ben: You want some dinner?
Mike: Yeah, everybody knows that. It's on TV all the time.
Ben: I believe you.
Maggie: Here you are. You're going to freeze out here. Jason: No, I’ve got my anger to keep me warm.Maggie: Could you share some with me? Maggie: Jason, I have something to tell you. I didn’t want to tell you but since you're
feeling betrayed by mike I figured you needed some good news. You are not really Mike’s father. Jason: Well, you know what I've been thinking? Maggie: That when Mike looked you in the eye and lied, it made you question your whole approach to teaching our kids the value of truth and honesty. And you're wondering if instead of encouraging them by example, a little fear or punishment might have been a bit more effective. And you're probably remembering the time when Mike was eight and he lied about finger painting the new rug and I wanted to
Jason: Just this week…. Mike: Ok, Ok, sometimes I lie, but there's a big difference between being a liar, and being a liar. I mean you guys should know when I'm telling the truth. I mean what kind of parents are you anyway? Jason: Disappointed. Mike: you want to know the truth? OK, I’ll tell the truth. Yeah, I was going to cheat, and I figured it as the only way. So I was up half the night copying all that stuff onto
my shoes, because I had to pass the test. But somehow it didn’t just go on my shoes, it got into my head too. Sure blew me away! But when it came time to look for the answers I didn’t have to, I knew them. Maggie: well, I’d like to believe you, Mike. Mike: Yeah. Jason: Well you have to admit, you're not exactly the type of guy who has a reputation for knowing things like Abraham Lincoln was the 17th president?Mike: Yeah, he was 16th president. Jason: Yeah, Grant was 17th.
Maggie: Tonight Joan leaves the Pope to marry a bricklayer.
Jason: Mike would be sorry he's missing that. Maggie: Where’s Mike anyway? I haven't seen him all evening.Jason: Well, he's upsatirs studying for his French test tomorrow. Maggie: you know, I really think we got through to him this time.
沪江英语编辑部
Growing Pains 119 V2.0
Mike: Alright, so who needs eggs anyway?
Carol: Ben! Ben: I like to scream. Carol: How lucky for you. Mike: Hey come on. Quiet down, you are going to wake them up. Do I have to do all the thinking?Ben: Just wait til I grow bigger. Carol: You are not going to grow bigger. Mum and dad were crying about it the other night.Mike: You guys ready?
Ben: (scream)
Carol: Mum! Ben: Dad! Mike: This is very strange. Carol: It's seven in the morning. Saturday morning. Where could they be? Ben: Well, maybe they finally had enough of us and moved.Mike: You know, this is exactly like that twilight zone I saw. See, there were these parents who everybody thought were just a little bit strange, and then one dark night, their kids
Jason: Hi mum!Maggie: Oh guys, what a lovely surprise. Jason: It's the best! But I have a patient to see. Your mum has that story to research and we probably won't even have any time to spend alone. So there's really no reason for you to endanger your lives in Grandma's car.Mike: Hey you guys can use the gift or not. That's up to you. But I'm not going to miss my chance to see twenty four of the hottest looking babes in the Big Apple.Ben: I'm with Mike, I've no idea why.Jason: Hey Mike. About these hot babes in the Cadre Four..
Maggie: The cleaning woman's coming. I can't let her see this mess.Jason: Sooner or later she's bound to find out that we're slobs. Come on, now we have a reservation for lunch. Rocco A beach, watching the waves caress the shore, sipping champagne from silver goblets, and toasting the woman I was lucky enough to find: Smart enough to marry, and handsome enough to keep.Maggie: oh Jason, you can be such a romantic sometimes. Jason: Hold that thought. Plumber: Hi. I'm Buzz, the plumber. You got a bum garbage disposal?
Jason: Gee, we cancelled that appointment. Didn't they call you in the truck? Plumber: They won't let me have a radio in my truck.Maggie: Well it's just that we have an appointment that we have to keep. Plumber: Well I could come back later. Jason: No thanks. Jason: and Maggie: Wait! Jason: How long would it take you to fix it? Plumber: Oh, half hour, forty five minutes.Jason: Ok, come in. Please. I'll call and move the reservation. Maggie: Oh Buzz, how much do you charge? Plumber: Fifty dollars an hour.
(phone rings)
Maggie: You know the Secretary of Transportation?
Jason: Yeah. Maggie: I'm meeting with the third assistant to the deputy of the under secretary, who reports to her. Jason: Wow! Maggie: Oh honestly honey, this is the only shot I’m going to get at this, and if I don't do it now, I’ve lost it. Jason: Well,Maggie: It's a forty five minute commuter flight to Washington. I can go do the interview and
be back in time to have dinner with you. My treat. Jason: Hmmm! Maggie: But, if you're disappointed, I'll stay home, I'll have lunch, I’ll be happy, I’ll be content, totally fulfilled. Jason: Look, if you gotta go.. Maggie: Thanks. I knew my dad was wrong about you. Jason: Just so at some point today, you and I finally get a chance to grout the tub. Maggie: Count on it! Plumber: I forgot my tool box.
Ben, Carol, Mike: Bye grandma. See you soon! Carol: I thought the gowns were beautiful. Mike: I think everyone connected with that show should be shot. Carol: Even the red head you whistled at? Ben: That would be...Maurice.
