Ben: Yeah, I was waiting up for you. Maggie: Well, why don't you stay up a few more minutes and keep my company while I eat. Ben: Great. Look what I made in art class. Maggie: Wow! How stylish.Ben: Yeah, and if I #####, that stuff won't hurt me. Maggie: They know you Ben. Ben: So do you have a picture I can put in it? Maggie: You want my picture? Ben: Oh yeah. Maggie: Gee Benjamin. This is quite an honor. Ben: And practical too. Maggie: Practical?
Jason: Well you are soaking, and you never prune out like this unless there's tension.Maggie: Well if you know me so well Jason, why didn't you let me know that I was failing as a
mother? Jason: Is that the darn door bell? Maggie: Aren't you going to tell me that I'm not failing as a mother? Jason: Of course Maggie. You're not failing as a mother. Maggie: Don't patronize me.Jason: Did you get fired today, or something? Maggie: No. At work everybody loves me. Jason: Well, before I turn in, I think I'll go buff the Volvo.
Maggie: At home, on the other hand, little Ben has to carry a picture of me to remember what I look like.Jason: Maggie, Ben carries pictures of Rambo.Maggie: I totally forgot about the mothers club meeting.Jason: Do you want a massage? Maggie: Then I find this. Read this. Jason: You might have to help me here Mag. Maggie: It's a letter form the Wendell Wenkie elementary school mothers club. And the first line says fellow mothers, and it’s addressed to you. An official body of the long island school system recognizes you as Bens mother.
Judy: Girls, girls, let’s grab our seats.Ok. We have a lot of carnival business to discuss before we can get to those luscious, tantalizing, very succulent desserts. Some of which are still warm. So, any old business? Yes Gracey. Gracey: I just wanted to tell Jason that I tried his rump roast marinade recipe, and my whole family just adored it. Jason: Oh good. Well if you want to have some real excitement next time, try soaking your rump for two full days.
Judy: Ok, any new business? First of all I think.. Yes Maggie: Hello, I'm Maggie Seaver and I'm the other Seaver mother. And I just wanted to say that I'd be happy to volunteer to help out at Saturday’s carnival. Ladies: Oh! (Applause) Jason: Bravo! Maggie: And I know I'm a little late, but since this is to raise money for our kid’s school, I know how important it is, anything I can do to help. Judy: Oh! That is the Wendell Wilkie spirit. Come on ladies! Maggie Seaver you come on down!Oh, you need to get with Gracey Thornton. She's our carnival chairman. Chairperson. Yes Gracey.
Maggie: Wait a minute. How many of you have volunteered to work on the carnival? Well with this attitude, I’m surprised somebody hasn't moved to cancel the whole carnival.
Lady: I second that motion.Maggie: Stop it. So this means we are all too busy to help the children. Is that it? Well look. I’m busy too but I am going to make the time. What do you all have to do that's so important? The cooking? The laundry. The housekeeping.Macey: I'm arguing a case before the state supreme court.Maggie: Ok. But what about the rest of us? Jason: I'll volunteer. Maggie: And this is a very busy man.
Jason: Yes. You know I’m a psychiatrist. I could spend up to eight hours a day, on my anal retentives alone.Maggie: Aren't we all forgetting what’s important here. The children. They are why we're here. Are we really all going to sit here and let our kids down, just when they need us the most? Lady: I volunteer. Lady: me too. Maggie: Great. Lady: I'll volunteer. Macey: Oh, to heck with my client. Let him fry.
(Later that week)
Maggie: Ben, I said no arguments. We are doing all this for you. If you can't help, you can at
least stay out of the way. Mike: Yeah. We're working here.Carol: Mum. The chilly just burped. Maggie: That means it’s ready.
Maggie: All this is wonderful. We have a huge crowd gathering outside, so we're either going to have a festival, or riot.Jason: Well, I’ve got the two twenty split up, I’ve the one ten all fired up and ready to go.
Sounds like I know what I’m doing. Doesn't it? Alright everybody, hit. Everyone: Oh Jason. Yeah!.....(power fails) oh! Jason: Well at least be thankful I’m not running a nuclear power plant. Just a short somewhere. I’ll take care of it. Maggie: Ok. Ok, everybody ready? Kissing Lady: Kissing booth ready. Mike: Poker booth ready.Macey: Dart booth ready. Lady: Cotton candy booth ready. Carol Do I have to wear this hat? Lady: Face painting booth ready. Maggie: Oh good work Clarabelle. Now what about the auction booth? Oh I’m running that. Ok auction booth ready.Judy: I need help with my what-cha-ma-call-it booth. Kissing Lady: I could use some male lips in my booth. Jason: Alright. Hit it again Earl.Everyone: Yeah! Oh! Wow! Maggie: Jason, if you're through, we need some help on the booths. Kissing lady: Over here Jason. Fat Lady: Oh Jason. Help me!
Maggie: You would have to pick her?
Judy: Maggie. May I say, in the calm before the storm, that, well you're an inspiration to all the other mothers. Balancing a career, kids, this carnival. Oh, what a gal! It is so wonderful to meet someone at lifes banquet, who is able to dish up another helping.
Girl: look at them. They think they are doing all this for us.Ben: Yeah.
Girl: And they are really doing it for themselves. Ben: Yeah!Girl: Blatant self aggrandizement. Ben: Yeah. Girl: It’s disgusting. Ben: Which mother's yours? Girl: the one that looks like Marianne from Gilligan’s island. Which one is yours? Ben: The one who's ignoring me. She wouldn't even let me run the dart booth, just because
she said I’m so unpredictable. Which one was Marianne?
Maggie: Going once. Going twice. Sold. Use it in good health sir. Well that's our last animal item. What do we have left Gale?Oh, somebody donated a little clay cameo. With my picture in it. Let’s start...No, my picture. Where did this come from Gale?Gale: It was in the box. Maggie: Ben.Man: A buck. Maggie: Just a minute. Lady: Two bucks. Gale: Ho! Maggie: I can't sell this. Man: Two fifty Gale: Ho! Lady: Five bucks. Maggie: This is not for sale. Man: Ten. Gale: Ho! Maggie: Twelve. Lady: Fifteen. Maggie: Sixteen. Man: Seventeen. Gale: Ho!
Gale: Maggie! Maggie: Thirty. Gale: Stop. Maggie: Thirty five. Going once, going twice, sold!
Gale: Alrighty righty righty! So what’s my opening bid for a box of size 38 double d braziers? Man: One thousand dollars. Gale: Sold. Mike: Ok, judgment day. Fifth and final card. The seven from heaven. Wow. Three of a kind. A ten. Lousy luck, ride the garbage truck. And a Jake. What does that make? Two pair, life’s not fair. And an ace for the ace. Another full boat. Dealer wins again. And on behalf of all the little children, I thank you.Maggie: Mike, have you seen Ben?
Mike: Yeah, he came by and gave me all his tickets.Maggie: Why would he do that? Mike: Mum, very little of what Ben does makes sense.Maggie: I better check with Carol. Mike: Yeah, good idea. She's just as weird as he is.Carol Well, look at it this way. If you can't eat it you could strip your furniture with it.Maggie: carol, has Ben been around here? Carol Just for a second. Same as everybody else mum. Smell this stuff. Maggie: did he say anything? Carol Well, he asked for my house key. Maggie: Did he say why? Carol He may have. You know I think this chilly is effecting my hearing.Maggie: Jason! Jason: Not now honey. I'm a little.....(falls in water) So what did you want?
Ben: Mum. Where have you been? Maggie: At your carnival Ben. Until I found out you left without a word. Ben: You were busy. Maggie: Bennie. I am never too busy for you.Ben: Mum, I left hours ago. And you show up now. Maggie: So you wanted to worry me? Ben: I wanted something. Maggie: Is that why you got rid of this?
Ben: I was wondering where that went. Maggie: Well I found it in the auction box.Ben: How did it get there? Maggie: So you wanted me to find it and come running home? Ben: No. I wanted you to miss me and come running home. Maggie: Ben, there were three hundred people there. Ben: Yeah. But only one who's your most favorite ten year old on the planet.Maggie: Honey. Why do you think I volunteered? Ben: I don't know. I didn't know anything except you were a really great mom before that stupid carnival.
Mike: Alright! Lets here it for the little spit baller with pigtails. Alright! That’s thirty eight in a row. Girl: Thirty seven. This next one will be thirty eight. Mike: Ok, now carnivals almost over folks. We don't want you to go home with any coupons in your pockets, so you can help out over here and sink a shrink for charity.
Jason: Hey Judy. I'm out of here Judy. You're going to have to find another sinkee. Everyone: Boo!Mike: Come on dad. Remember this is all for a very good cause. Jason: I know that. You what? You want to take my place. Everyone: Applause. Jason: So ladies and gentlemen, just one dollar. Seventy five cents, fifty cents, I’ll loan you a dollar. Step right up here. My money is your shot. Go ahead and dunk a punk. Yes ladies and gentlemen. Go for it!
Carol Ah, may I try? I'm his sister.
沪江英语编辑部
10
Growing Pains 219 The Awful Truth V2.0
注意：请及时到http://shop.hjenglish.com/gp.htm 更新脚本的版本，以达到最好的学习效果。如下载不成功，可致电：021－61024027，所有正版用户均享受此升级权限。新版本可能包含的内容：更准确的脚本内容、关键词的用法讲解、特殊句型的灵活使用等。沪江英语Maggie Ok we’ll be back right after lunch. You have the number to the restaurant in case anything happens. Mikeyeah, don’t worry if ben and carol act up I’ll slap ‘em around a little bit. Just kidding dad. Jason let’s go honey Mikedivorced, boy Ben yeah Mike you know ever since he started punishing me I’ve had my doubts about the man Carol now hold it, ok? This could be a mistake. I just can’t believe this about our wonderful dad. Mike c ’mon carol the evidence is right here! Ben yeah! Carol well it could be a big mistake. Mikecarol, it’s obvious Ben yeah! Carol what’s obvious? Mikethat dad’s divorced. We’re living a lie. You know I wouldn’t be a bit surprised if dad wasn’t his real name. Carol I just, I can’t believe this. Especially after all the times he’s told about their huge wedding and how grandpa Ed fainted when he got the bell. Ben and how it was the happiest day of mom’s life Mikeand how dad toasted her and said that she was Mike and carol the only woman he ever wanted to marry. Ben yeah MikeI mean if he lied about this, then Carol well, we don’t know that he lied, he just didn’t tell us Mikesame thing
Carol not exactly Mikewell it was a lie last year when I cut school and didn’t tell them Carol no no, see that was different. Now see, when they asked you how school was you said “extremely pleasant”Mikewhich it was Carol no , it wasn’t Mikeit was too Carol it wasn’t Mikeit was. Carol wasn’t Ben what’s your point?
Maybe they come over here when we’re at school. And wear
our clothes! And play with our stuff! That’s why my room gets so messed up!
Carol you’re crazy. And mike, you’re worse. I mean I can’t even believe I’m related to. . . .
that’s it! It all makes sense. It’s true!
Mikewhat?
Carol dad did have kids with his first wife. At least one. And when they split he kept that
child and when he met mom they swore an oath never to tell him that he was the painfully slow half brother of me and ben! Mikeso who is it?
Mikeahh, hhaha look at this! Carol what did you find? Mikeit’s a picture of dad’s first wife Carol let me see. Well how do you know it’s his first wife? Mikeit’s the only woman’s picture we found after an hour of looking. Carol so?
their bedroom.
Ben you know mike? I’ve been thinking. I don’t think dad ever did get divorced.
Mikeno?
Ben I think that book was all a big joke I mean the people that gave it to him were all
doctors. You know what nutty guys they are. Mikeyeah, but I found a picture of his first wife and get this, her name was petula and she had a fake mole painted on her face. Ben wow!
Mikeyeah, I’ve seen it! Ben I need another sandwich Mikehey hey hey, what’s this? Ben what? Mikeoh no! Ben what? Mikecarol, look what we found Carol what? Ben another stupid wife Carol you don’t know this woman was married to dad Mikethen why did he hide it?
Carol what else is in here? Mikejust the usual stuff. Baby pictures, first flowers, a charm bracelet. Carol an old letter to mom Mikeooh ooh. Read it. Carol no! we shouldn’t Mike c’mon Carol it’s from Grandpa Ed dear Margaret Catherine in all the confusion of the past few weeks I haven’t found the time to tell you that your mom and I love you very much. There’s
no reason to lose heart just because that ex-husband of yours turned out to be a lunkhead. Mikeso that means mom was divorced too. Good thing ben wasn’t in here. He’d be eating the furniture.
Ben (burp) Maggie hi guys Kidshi Carol
where’s dad? Maggie oh, we split up. For the afternoon. Kidsohh Maggie he dropped me off and then went for a haircut Ben argghhhh! Jason hi honey Maggie hi, oh I thought you were getting a haircut? Jason I did Maggie it doesn’t look like it Jason of course it doesn’t . that’s why they charge so much. Where are the kids? Maggie Jason it’s eerie. They aren’t yelling. They aren’t fighting.Jason this is a bad thing?Ben hi, what’s the name of your barber? Jason uhh, Linda.
JasonBen yeah right? Maggie You’ll spoil your appetite.
Carol well why don’t we just ask them about these divorces? Mikecarol, after everything we’ve learned here do you really think they’re going to tell us the truth? Carol well we gotta do something before ben ends up with a harpoon sticking out of him. Mikeok listen, guys, I’ve formulated a plan Carol what? Mikenow when we do something wrong, only mom and dad don’t know quite what it is, they usually get us into this conversation about other junk just to trick us into saying too much so let’s just do that to them. Carol they never do that to me Mikewell carol, that’s because you live a very sad, uninteresting and boring life. Now do you
want to talk about that or do you want to talk about this plan? Ben the plan! Carol yeah Mikealright, ok now I’ll work on dad and carol, you work on mom Ben who do I work on? Mikelosing weight
Mikedad, do you have a second to rap with me? Jason you want to rap? Mikeyeah, is that the right wordJason yeah sure if you’re sammy davis jr.
Do you know any petula who’s a barber? One with, oh, Nice
say a mole painted on her face? Jason no. ben mentioned it. Mikeoh I see.Jason mike, are you enjoying this conversation? Mikeok um, alright here it is. I’m having a little problem with my social life dad. And I figured that a guy like you has probably dated around a lot. Jason yeah, well it was a long time ago but uh, yeah Mikeyeah. You probably even went steady a time or two right?
Jason yeah. Mike heck, you probably even married a few of em right? Jason what?
Carol did you know that most divorced people never have to set the table? Maggie what? Carol well it’s a well known fact that they eat most meals hunched over a sink. Maggie oh carol. Carol you wouldn’t think it was so funny if you were divorced Maggie well it sure would save me a lot of time in the kitchen Carol well fine, duck the question! Maggie carol, what question am I ducking?
