Grandma takes an oddly-shaped little key from a drawer and frees me from the table-lamp-mousetrap.I lick my fingers.The cheese still smells delicious.
“Why are you doing experiments this late in the night？”I can’t help but ask.
“With bacterial colony growth，I have to take observations every hour.”Smiling，Grandma leads me over to a milk-colored countertop.A neat row of round Petri dishes lie on the counter，each filled with a translucent substance that looks like medicinal cream.
“Is this...nutrient agar？”I’ve done similar experiments at school.
Grandma nods.“I’m observing the movement of transposons in the bacteria.”
“Transposons？”
Grandma opens one of the Petri dishes on her end.She hefts it in her hand and says，“They’re pieces of DNA capable of encoding reverse transcription enzyme，which allows them to migrate along DNA，breaking away or re-integrating themselves.I want to use them to insert synthetic genes for drug resistance.”
Grandma sets the lid back on.“But I don’t know if it will work.This Petri dish is exposed to the air，providing a low-humidity environment.The one next to it is submerged in a sugar solution.The one after that has been enriched with extra ATP.”
I follow her example and open the Petri dish closest to me.“What are the conditions in this one？”
I dab my cheese-covered fingertip on the agar.I know that having plenty of nutrients makes cells reproduce faster，which should speed up the genetic integration.
“Zhanzhan！”Grandma hesitates，then says，“That’s the control sample.It’s not supposed to have any added factors.”
I’m always like that，full of assumptions when I do things，and careless ones at that.
One time，when Jingjing and I fought，she said that I always went about things impulsively，inconsiderately，immaturely.She’s right，I think.She was complaining about the way I always forgot to call her，but I know my problem goes further than that.Jingjing’s a person with lots of plans，and the capability to carry out each one of them reliably，but I’m the total opposite.When I try to carry out my plans，they always go wrong，as sure as bread lands butter-side down.
Without a control，Grandma will have to redo the whole experiment.She can keep observing，technically，but at the least she wouldn’t be able to use it in proper published results.
I’m panicked，unsure of what I should do，but Grandma doesn’t seem to be angry at all.
“It’s no big deal，”Grandma says.“I could use a sample with added cholesterol anyway.”
And Grandma really does take out a marker pen，makes a note on the lid，and keeps on observing.
3
The next morning，Grandma makes sweet osmanthus flower porridge.The morning sun is lovely shining down on the countryside.The only sound for miles around is birdsong.
Grandma asks me if I have any plans for these few days.None，I say.That’s the truth.The only thing I might want to do is think about what I might want to do.
“Your mother says your graduation was delayed because of English，but I don’t see how that could be the case.Weren’t you an English major before you switched？You should be quite good at English.”
“I didn’t test past the fourth level，”I mumble.“I forgot to register in junior year，and this year I forgot the test date.”
I gulp down the porridge with my head lowered，and stuff up my mouth with a sandwich.
I’m not afraid of any English exams，no，but that might have been why I failed to take them seriously.As for my change in major，that’s starting to look like another mistake.I switched to environmental studies，only to discover I didn’t care that much about the environment.Then I fled to hardware engineering in junior year，and attended a year’s worth of biology too.The result was today：I was jack of all majors，master of none.
Grandma cuts me another half slice of bacon.“What did your mother say before you came？”
“Nothing in particular.She just wants me to take a breather here，and read some books on economics if I have the time.”
“Your mother wants you to study economics？”
“Yeah，she says that no matter what company I end up working for，knowing a bit of economics will come in handy.”
My mom thinks that I should set a target，then study whatever I needed to get there.But I was lacking in precisely that department.None of the big goals I set ever lasted more than a few days before I nixed them，which left me without any impetus to work on the tasks at hand.
“You shouldn’t worry too much about the future.”Seeing that I’ve finished eating，Grandma begins to clear the table.“Just like the nose didn’t evolve to prop up glasses.”
Jingjing told me the same thing.“The nose evolved for the purpose of breathing，”she said.God sculpted us all into our own unique forms，so we shouldn’t worry about what other people thought，and stand firm on who we were.So Jingjing left the country，in accordance to who she was.But I was missing that sense of unique purpose too.God never got around to telling me who I was.
My mind is elsewhere as I help clear the table.The leftover porridge splatters all over the floor.My face immediately heats.
“Don’t worry，it’s no big deal.”Grandma takes the pot from me and fetches a mop.
“...It’s flowed into the corner.Won’t that be hard to mop up？Do you have a cloth for cleaning the floor？I’ll do it，”I say，embarrassed.
I think of the way Mom would crouch and meticulously wipe down the crevice where the floor met the wall.Our house was always squeaky clean.Mom hated nothing more than my brand of haphazardness.
“It’s no big deal，really.”Grandma mops up the center of the dining room.“We’ll leave the corner as is.”
She notices that I’m at a loss.“I’m accident-prone myself，”she laughs.“I spill things everywhere.That’s why I laid down culture medium for growing fungi next to the walls.This way I’ll have material for my experiments.”
I bend down to look by the wall.There really is a band of pale green fuzz stretching around the room.From a distance，it looked like decorative trimming along the perimeter of the floor.
“Sweet porridge is ideal，actually.We might even get mushrooms.”
She sees that I’m still awkwardly standing in place，so she adds，“How about this？If you don’t have anything in particular to do these few days，do you want to help me grow fungi？”
I nod without hesitation.
It’s not just because I want to make up for the mess I made.More than that，I feel I need to change how I spend my days.Up until now，my life has been incoherent and scattershot.I haven’t been able to commit to any one of the well-trodden paths in life，or chart my own course.Maybe what I need is opportunity，even accidentally.
4
Grandma likes to say that purpose comes afterward.
Grandma rejects any form of teleology，from animism to vitalism.She doesn’t believe that evolution has a destination and dislikes explanations like“eyes grew eyelashes to keep dust out.”She doesn’t even think cells evolved membranes for self-protection.
“The enclosing membrane came before the cell could exist，”Grandmother says.“Same with G protein-coupled receptors.It became light-sensitive rhodopsin in the eyes and olfactory receptors in the nose.”
It’s a sort of Darwinism，I suppose：first mutation，then selection.First the protein，then the chemical reaction in which to participate.First the ability to encode an enzyme，then the sensory organ that uses the enzyme.
Existence precedes essence，I think the saying goes？
A few evenings later，good news comes from Grandma’s lab：the NTL reagent stain finally reveals the protein we’re looking for in the cytoplasm.A molecular weight test with the centrifuge confirms this.The transposons have successfully reverse transcribed their payload.
After several days of continuous pursuit and observation，you let out a breath at that kind of result.As I help Grandma clean up the lab，I ask，“What gene were we inserting，anyway？”
“A cell suicide signal，”Grandma says placidly.
“Wait，what？”
Grandma bends to sweep up the bits and pieces under the experiment counter.“This experiment was primarily meant as cancer treatment research.Cancer cells are simply cells that don’t die when they should，as you know.”
“Huh.”I pick up the dustpan.“Does that mean you can apply for a patent now？”
Grandma shakes her head.“I don’t want to do that yet.”
“How come？”
“I don’t know if this kind of reverse transcription might have delayed side effects.”
“What do you mean？”
Grandma doesn’t immediately answer.She collects the test tubes and wipes the counter clean.I tie up the trash bag and follow her downstairs to the garden.
“I suppose you haven’t heard the hypothesis of how viruses evolved？Transposons promote genetic recombination inside a cell，but on the loose outside of the cell，they can become viruses，like HIV.”
The summer breeze is warm and dry，but I involuntarily shiver.
So viruses split off from cells themselves.It makes me think of the square root calculator turned execution device in Wang Xiaobo’s book.There’s the same dark humor to it.
I understand Grandma’s attitude，but I can’t help but feel a little dissatisfied deep down.“Still，this technology could cure cancer.Aren’t you afraid someone will beat you to the patent？”
Grandma shakes her head.“What does that matter？”
Peng.At that moment，a thump comes from the other side of the garden.
Grandma and I hurry over，only to see a pudgy，sweaty face emerge from the other side of the garden fence，among the climbing roses.
“Hello...I’m terribly sorry，I was trying to rearrange my flower rack，but my hand slipped，and I smashed up your flowers by accident.”
I look down.He dropped a container of chrysanthemums，the flowerpot lying in pieces.Underneath are Grandma’s azaleas，an equally gory sight.
“Oh，right，I just moved here.I’ll be your neighbor from now on.”The fat middle-aged guy is nodding on autopilot.“I really am very sorry，ma’am.It’s my first day here and I’ve already given you trouble.”
“Don’t worry，it’s no big deal.”Grandma smiles genially.
“I’m terribly sorry.I’ll bring you flowers tomorrow to replace it.”
“It’s no big deal，really.I can take the opportunity to extract some chloroplasts and anthocyanin from the leaves and flowers.Don’t mind it.”Grandma bends down as she speaks and starts picking up flowerpot shards.
I stand in the yard，the summer night cool around me.My mind is a jumble.
I’ve discovered that Grandma’s catchphrase is“it’s no big deal.”It might be that most things in Grandma’s eyes really are no big deal.Fame，influence，personal property—none of them matter much at Grandma’s point in life，admittedly.She does whatever she feels like，and to her，it’s enough.
But what about me？I think.
What am I going to do once the summer’s over？Return to school，everything the same as before，and meander around for another year until graduation？
I know that’s not what I want.
5
When next morning comes around，I help Grandma take care of the shattered flowers，extracting the chlorophyll with acetone.With that，Grandma enthusiastically adds a new member to her enormous team of test subjects.
I spend the entire morning mentally battling with myself.Close to noon，I finally make my choice.No matter what，I think，I should first go to the patent office and ask a few questions.Conveniently，the guy next door comes over in the afternoon to make amends.I take the opportunity to run off on my own.
The website gave clear directions to the patent office，and I find it easily.The four-story building is plain but stately，the lobby quiet and well-lit.A graceful，pretty girl sits behind the receptionist’s desk，reading a book.
“H-hello，I’d like to apply for a patent.”
She looks up and smiles.“Hello.Fill out the form over there，please.What are you patenting？”
“Uh，an anti-cancer biological factor.”
“Then you’ll want to head to Hall 3，the Biology and Chemistry Office.”She points toward the right.As I turn，she muses to herself，“Strange，why are there so many people applying for anti-cancer factors today？”
I spin right back around.“Wait，there was someone else before me？”
“Yes，an older man came just this morning.”
My heart lurches.I sense something’s not quite right.
“Do you know what technology he was patenting，specifically？”
“I don’t know，I’m afraid.”
“Was it a drug，or something else？”
The girl sighs.“I’m just a college student working here for the summer.It’s not my business to look at the applications.You should go in and ask yourself.”With that，the girl lowers her head once more and resumes scribbling and underlining.
I bend over to look.It’s a book of English vocabulary.“You’re memorizing vocabulary？”I ask，trying to get her on my side.“I’m doing that too.”
“Oh？You’re a college student？”She raises her head and looks me over curiously.“And you already have something to patent？That’s impressive.”
“Ah...no，you’ve got it wrong.”My face flushes a little.“I’m just looking in on behalf of my academic advisor.Do you remember what that older guy looked like？I think my advisor might have come here already without telling me.”
“Hmm...he was short，on the plump side，kind of bald.I think he was wearing a yellow jacket.I don’t remember anything else.”
Like I suspected.No wonder I noticed something was off when I left the house.
The middle-aged guy next door arrived with his flowers just then.I took the flowerpot from him，and when he went to open the door for me，he pushed on the side of the door closer to the hinges without hesitation.Someone here for the first time wouldn’t have known to do that.I understand now.Last night wasn’t purely chance.He must have accidentally knocked over the flowers while eavesdropping.
He really has no sense of decency，coming over again today，I think.I need to hurry and tell Grandma.He probably thought that we wouldn’t be applying for a patent and would never find out.Good thing I came here.
“Leaving already？”the girl calls out as I head for the door.“Here’s a pamphlet，then.It has an introduction to the patent office and an explanation of the application process，plus contact information.”
I manage a smile.I accept the pamphlet，stick it in my pocket，and stride quickly out the door.
6
I rush home only to find Grandma in her lab like usual，calmly looking through her microscope.She’s a quiet，steady island amid a chaos of river torrents.
“Grandma…”I force my panting and puffing under control.“He stole your Petri dishes…”
“Back from somewhere？Where did you go，to end up so dusty？”Grandma looks up，smiling，and brushes at my jacket.
“I went—”I fall silent，unsure of how to explain my trip to the patent office.I change tack.“Grandma，that fat guy next door stole your Petri dishes and applied for a patent.”
Unexpectedly，Grandma only smiles.“It’s no big deal.I can continue my research just fine.Moreover，like I told you，the experiment we conducted was very crude and preliminary.The results can’t be put into application as they are.”
